How to word this on an invite…….

posted 1 year ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
524 posts
Busy bee

You could just simply not have a registry and people might get the hint without it being said. And if people were to ask where you’re registered you could say “Oh we’re not doing gifts, just bring your love!” and that works too. 

Post # 3
Member
1003 posts
Bumble bee

The good news is “There is no need to bring a gift, but if you want to, it’s whatever” is actually the default for weddings – so I would just not say anything and let the chips fall where they fall. If people ask just say “thanks for asking but we don’t need anything right now, just happy for you to celebrate with us” or something similar

Post # 4
Member
4098 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I’ve never even seen a wedding invitation that mentioned gifts at all, so I just wouldn’t include anything about it at all. 

Post # 5
Member
9635 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

you don’t.  it’s tacky to mention gifts.  don’t register.  if someone asked you point blank, you can answer with above.  but otherwise, don’t bring it up.

 

Post # 6
Member
2006 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I said something to the effect of  “There will be no registry.  All we require is your presence and your willingness to celebrate our day”  or something like that.  I didn’t put it on the invitation but I put it on our wedding site.

I still ended up getting gifts.

Post # 7
Member
561 posts
Busy bee

i wouldn’t mention gifts at all.  don’t register and if people ask, just politely say no gifts.  you could also put something stating no gifts on your wedding webpage if you’re doing one.

Post # 8
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2020

Just because you’re not expecting gifts doesnt mean you can’t register. You don’t typically mention the registry on an invite anyway, so I think you can just tell anyone that asks where you’re registered where you’re registered (some people are going to buy gifts regardless, it’s probably better to get a few things you actually want than whatever they guess) but you’re not expecting gifts. 

A cash fund is also probably a good way to get around this. That way if they do want to give you something they can give the amount they think is appropriate. 

Post # 9
Member
1334 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I always feel that couples who don’t make a registry known would prefer cash and gift accordingly. 

If you truly don’t want gifts/cash then I dont see anything wrong with making it clear, though I wouldn’t do it on the invitation.  I’d put it on your wedding website and would word it just as you did, only a little more emphatically, such as “please do not bring gifts, just bring your love” as opposed to “there is no need…”

Post # 10
Member
10275 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

That’s just implied. A gift is never required and mentioning them on the invite is rude.

Post # 11
Member
1739 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2020

Don’t mention gifts at all on the invite

Your website is the place to talk about a registry, or lack thereof

I’ve seen people put stuff like, your presence is our present

Post # 12
Member
1194 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1995

You don’t.  Gifts should not be mentioned in the invite.

Post # 13
Member
1090 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Agree with PP. Don’t mention gifts but also don’t register and that should be fine.

My husband and I also didn’t really want gifts, so we did a VERY small registry (it had like 15 things in it) but we didn’t make it a big thing. When people asked “are you registered anywhere?” We just told them. Figured people who wanted to give us gifts would, so might as well have the option to give them a little direction.

We ended up getting mostly money, about 5 things from the registry, and a couple of very cool custom gifts that were still very much appreciated (like custom funkos of me and my husband! Haha)

Post # 14
Member
795 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
@futuremrscat:  “Your presence on our special day is the only gift we request, thank you.”

Post # 15
Member
713 posts
Busy bee

I know you have good intentions, but I think putting something like that on the invitation just confuses people. I’ve gotten invites stating “no gifts” but still give something because I just feel awkward and like a cheapskate not giving anything. Plus if you put it like “gifts aren’t needed but you can if you want” you’re kind of sending a mixed message. Just don’t write anything about gifts on the invite.

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