(Closed) how “traditional” are you?

posted 8 years ago in Beehive
  • poll: How traditional do you consider yourself?
    Very traditional. : (7 votes)
    8 %
    Somewhat traditional. : (34 votes)
    39 %
    Somewhat non-traditional. : (35 votes)
    40 %
    Very non-traditional : (12 votes)
    14 %
  • Post # 3
    1251 posts
    Bumble bee

    I am somewhere between some-what and very-non traditional. I could never propose to my SO, and I want to wear white/ivory on my wedding day. But beyond that, I don’t care much about any other wedding tradtions.

    Post # 4
    82 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I’m the farthest thing from tradional that you can get probably.  Nothing about my ceremony is going to be the traditional lines. From a black/red dress to gothic metal music at the reception. Not an ouce of normal stuff there.

    Post # 5
    5670 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I find that I am very traditional with a modern twist. I am having a traditional wedding to a guy I have never lived with. Before he proposed he did ask for my parents permission. My dad is walking me down the aisle, I am having a blusher veil. We are also doing to bouquet and garter toss and are changing for our last dance as well. I like to cook and in that respect I fall into a traditional role in our relationship as well, however I do have an education and work hard and even make more money than Fiance. I run the money and things like that so I’m not submissive in a traditional role, but at the same time I do want to be a stay at home parent.

    Post # 6
    1732 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I think I am very traditional, and Fiance is mostly on the same page.  We live together, that’s just abut the only thing.

    The wedding is a perfect reflection of that.  he asked my dad for my hand, getting married in my hometown in my family’s church, wearing a big white dress and my mom’s blusher/veil, registered for china and all the usual suspects, taking his name, etc etc etc.

    I love it.  I am of the opinion that some of these things are traditions for a reason.

    Post # 7
    1820 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    This is a fun question and will really be a get-to-know-your-bees post, I bet.

    I am pretty traditional in a lot ways – ettiquette is really important to me, my FH asked my dad for his blessing to marry me, I am having my dad walk me down the aisle, I am wearing a white dress and a blusher, I am changing my name, I really want to be a mom, etc.

    But, in all the important ways, I am totally non-traditional – we are having a very non-religious outdoor ceremony, we lived together for 5+ years before getting married and bought a house together 2 years ago, we are staying together the night before the wedding (I don’t think I would be able to sleep otherwise!), we are not having a bouquet toss/garter/cake/attendants, and I am a very equal partner in our home – professional career, shared housework, etc.

    Post # 8
    2249 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2018

    I am a lot more traditional than I thought, but I only cared about the traditions I was aware of, so it never occured to me that white shoes were traditional. wedding day midge always wore the pink ones that I glued glitter on to. lol. I always thought of myself as pretty modern, but my grandma sent me a card the other day addressed to Mrs. (my husban’s name) and I loved it. except he didn’t see the mes poart and opened it lol.

    Post # 9
    593 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I think I am pretty traditional and my husband is very…NOT. I can still remember the record-scratching moment when he told me he doesn’t “do Christmas” almost eight years ago like it was yesterday. Over the years, our occasionally oppositional views on tradition have helped us figure out what is actually important to us vs. what were raised to believe is important.

    Post # 10
    58 posts
    Worker bee

    SO and I are a weird mix of tradition. We’re gay, and she blurs all kinds of gender roles. So that is pretty non-traditional. Our ceremony will be very non-traditional, because let’s be blunt here – it’s not a legal marriage- no officiant needed. (of course, if given the option, I’d walk across broken glass for a legal marriage, traditional ceremony, and an officiant).

    However, in talking about our wedding, there are many traditional aspects we adore- I want a white, long dress and a bouquet of flowers. We want a “traditional” reception/party complete with matching decor, lovely catering, booze, music, and a dance floor. We don’t like cakes/cake cutting, garter belts, assigned seating, first dance, no fathers walking down the aisle and a few other things. We’re definitely mixing and matching.

    Post # 12
    837 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I think I’m in between (I know how generic of an answer lol).  For example I’m “modern/nontraditional” in that my Fiance and I live together, we have written our own ceremony (not just vows the whole thing), his brother is marrying us, I hate traditional wedding cakes so we are doing a funky design, I have a bridesman – who’s gay lol, our wedding chairs are black not white (i don’t know why this was so important to me, I just don’t like the white chairs lol)…  There’s tons of others but I can’t think of them right now lol

    I’m traditional in that I look forward to taking his name and starting out own little family (with dogs not children lol), I’m wearing a white ballgown that I LOVE (when else am I going to have an excise to wear a ballgown?!), I love that I have an engagement and this is no offense to anyone who doesn’t have one/want one, but I would be HIGHLY disappointed if he didn’t give me one just because I think it’s something that’s special.  My parents are paying for a good chunk of the wedding, his parents are paying for the rehearsal dinner.

    Post # 13
    2344 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I would say with our wedding, on a scale of 1-10, I was an 8 in terms of traditional. Even though my dad didn’t walk me down the aisle, a man still gave me away (my brother). We had a pretty conventional, religious ceremony. Our reception was brunch so that was a little unconventional, and we didn’t have the bouquet or garter tosses, but it felt very traditional wedding. We had toasts, cut the cake, I wore a white dress, etc. 

    I would like to say our marriage is pretty nontraditional. We consider ourselves equal partners and thus far we both do things equally in the household. However, I can’t say that gender norms don’t play a role in how we live our lives. I also feel like, by virtue of the fact that we are a young couple that decided to get married instead of living together indefinitely, we appear traditional.

    Something interesting that this brought to my mind – its so nice that once you are married, how traditional you are suddenly is only YOUR business, for the most part! During wedding planning, friends and family are so quick to evaluate your choices, but I feel like now that we are married, our decisions about how we will conduct our life together are much more private. Of course, once you have kids, you open yourself up to criticism once again!

    Post # 15
    6597 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I am fairly modern and untraditional. Living together with Fiance for 5 years, we own a house together, will be staying together the night before the wedding, we started planning our wedding before we were “officially” engaged, and everything I own is modern and streamlined.

    My wedding is very modern; however, it consists of a lot of the traditional wedding elements: white dress, veil, dad walking daughter down the aisle, parent dances, bouquet toss etc. However, we are putting our personal twists on everything. For example, I am playing “Move Bitch” by ludacris as my bouquet toss song, Fiance is doing a hammed up hockey garter toss and Fiance will be dancing to the chicken dance as his mother/son dance.

    Post # 16
    1032 posts
    Bumble bee

    @roxy821: I am the same way, and our wedding will be that way too, except we aren’t changing before we leave. The most none traditional thing I am doing with my wedding is wearing a fascinator with a little bit of feather action (maybe). We are so excited to finally live together!!

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