(Closed) How well do you get along with your FMIL?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: How well do you get along with your FMIL?
    We get along great! : (31 votes)
    43 %
    We get along OK, but are not close : (36 votes)
    50 %
    We do not get along at all : (4 votes)
    6 %
    Other : (1 votes)
    1 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1080 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    She thinks we get along great, but this is bc I mostly keep my mouth shut around her and do not tell her when she is being a huge B. We do not get along.

    Post # 4
    Member
    14186 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    We get along better than “good” but we aren’t BFF, probably b/c we live 30 min away. She doesn’t annoy me or bug me (in fact, i was at a family wedding and guffawed about an inappropriate dress someone was wearing and she laughed and elbowed SIL and said “we’re tacky like that, too!” haha). We feel the same about a lot of topics and she’s really considerate so I can’t complain! Now, DH’s extended family? They can jump on my last nerve.

    Post # 5
    Member
    355 posts
    Helper bee

    i really love my fmil and consider myself sooo grateful for that! she is always very supportive and has good intentions for us. she writes me cute emails from time to time and always makes me feel great:)

    Post # 6
    Member
    4466 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    We’re kinda meh.  We get along, but I wouldn’t say we are close.  In fact, she disliked me for the majority of our relationship and only starting sucking it up when she accepted the fact that Fiance and I are getting married and she’s stuck with me for life LoL.  We don’t fight or anything, but I don’t call her to chat or make plans with her unless I feel obligated. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1207 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    I really like my Future Mother-In-Law, she’s nice and thoughtful.  She does get on my nerves when I spend extended time (like over 3 or 4 days) with her.  But that’s because she lives far away and doesn’t get to see us often so when she does see us she is constantly up our butts and super clingy.  But otherwise we get along great!  We swap recipes by email constantly because we both like to cook!

    Post # 8
    Member
    3564 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I would say we get along very well, but we’re not close. A large reason for this (I feel) is the language barrier–her first language is Russian and while she understands English and can speak it fine, she is obviously more comfortable speaking Russian and she is not confident in her own ability to speak English.

    It actually makes me really sad, because she is such a sweet woman and I really really want to have a close, more than superficial relationship with her. I think it’ll take time, and practice on both our parts.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1956 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

    I would get a long a lot better with my Future Mother-In-Law if she wasn’t CRAZY! It kind of sucks, our relationship has become much more strained bc of the wedding planning, I used to like her a lot more before she planned the Rehearsal Dinner and after-wedding brunch with complete disregard to what we wanted or would have liked…But the good news is she doesn’t really know this and thinks we get along great, which is all that matters!

    Post # 10
    Member
    1110 posts
    Bumble bee

    We get along pretty well.  We don’t always see eye to eye on things, but she’s nice and means well.

    Post # 11
    Member
    2000 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    I posted something about this a few weeks ago! Me & Future Mother-In-Law get along fine…she’s kind of weird sometimes..& even Fiance agrees that she’s changing a little bit & has gotten a little weird. But she means well & we chat a good bit when we see each other, but we are not best friends by any means! 🙂

    Post # 12
    Member
    102 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    Lol stlginkgo I was going to say pretty much the same thing!  If that lady only knew what I really thought about her!  But I pretty much stay quiet about it because I just don’t think it’s worth the over all drama.

    Post # 13
    Member
    792 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    I like my mil a lot. She’s the complete opposite of my own mom. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom but she can be high maintenence at times… and she tends to make people uncomfortable without even trying. My mil on the other hand is very laid back and easy going. We get along great.

    Post # 14
    Member
    510 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: November 2010

    My Fiance is not very close with his mom (parents are divorced) but she’s always kind to me whenever we see her.

    Post # 15
    Member
    179 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    We have next to nothing in common so conversations are awkward, but she’s nice enough.

    Post # 16
    Member
    327 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I used to get along great with FI’s parents but all of that started to change after got engaged. I know they love me and are happy Fiance and I are getting married (which is what matters most) but they don’t get why the wedding is such a big deal/why it is black tie/why my parents are spending so much money etc. and it comes across as detached and disinterested, which really hurts my feelings. I also got a passive aggressive email from FI’s mom yesterday morning, so that re-opened hurt feelings on my end. I am also just incredibly different from FI’s mom – girlie, outgoing, very social, like fashion, etc. and I think she is amused, if not a little annoyed, that Fiance chose someone so different from her.

    My new strategy is to keep myself surrounded by all (and there are many) family and friends who ARE excited about the wedding, and keep Future In-Laws roles limited to only what is required. What else can you do? I certainly don’t want their bad outlook to spoil my next few months. 

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