Post # 1
Just wanted to get your opinion on something and to see what options you would look for in my situation.
The story goes, I’m not yet engaged but hope to be very soon- 99% sure by the end of the year and we would love to get married around next December in New York. Obviously, no plans have been made because we’re not engaged, we just have this idea that we really love.
However, a couple of weeks ago, my guy’s sister got engaged and is planning on getting married in Summer 2014.
My concern is now that with our weddings potentially only 6 months or so apart, we couldn’t possibly put his family under the added expense of going the whole way to New York (from Ireland) for ours. I’m not even sure his sister could afford it, and we obviously can’t do it without his family. We won’t be asking parents to contribute to our wedding but they’d still need to get themselves to New York and all the expense of that, and I just think it’s too much.
What do you ladies think? Should I give up on the New York dream?
Post # 3
If you mean New York City, and you’re not living there, you may want to reconsider either the location or the timeframe, as December in NYC is a pretty expensive time for anyone to travel. NYC hotels get full with holiday shoppers, so the room rates go way up even if you book in advance. Picking a random Saturday in mid-December 2012, I’m seeing rates over $400/night for a Hilton-level hotel— nice hotel but not five-star luxury. It’s going to be an expensive trip for anyone who travels, not just his parents, and that’s a very big thing to factor in. Of course if it’s just his family that has to travel, and most of your family and friends already are local, it becomes less of a deal-breaker.
For his parents, I’d just ask them if they’d be willing and able to travel then, and not try to guess. But do keep in mind you’re picking a peak time in a city that is already really expensive, and that will pare down your attendance.
Post # 4
I think you shouldn’t worry about it until you offically get engaged…but on the plus side your wedding is first
Post # 5
I think until you are engaged and you can have a conversation with his parents you wont know.
You might find that with enough notice they will be able to come, and you could always look at things that might help spread the cost e.g. renting an apartment for a week rather than staying in a hotel.