(Closed) How would you react if….?

posted 7 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 32
Member
1143 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think I *might* be okay being a surrogate, but not so much donating an egg. I think the only way I’d be comfortable donating an egg would be to my sister, but not to a friend. Not sure about my husband, but he’d probably say no.

Post # 33
Member
1309 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’ve never been asked, but have thought about it.

I would be a surrogate for a friend but not give eggs. But I would give eggs anonymously to a stranger.

I might give eggs to a sibling, but I’m not sure. I’d need to think about that one a little more.

Post # 34
Member
428 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I like to think I’d be ok with it (and maybe have a godmother role). But I’ve never had a kid and I understand the hormones change everything and it’s very hard to give the baby up. So… it’s hard to say for sure. My Fiance donated sperm at a bank in his earlier years (before we met) and he’s almost certain that there are children that resulted from it in the world now. The thought doesn’t bother me at all, even though when they’re 18 they can open the records and may be contacting us. 

Post # 35
Member
3400 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I wouldn’t be comfortable with it, and I’ve definitely never had anybody ask.

I wouldn’t want to donate eggs or my FI’s sperm because that would be one of our children genetically, and I wouldn’t want to carry anybody else’s child because that just seems a little over-the-top to me.

My Fiance & I have also gone over all the scenarios in our head as to what we would do if we decided we want children (not 100% sure we do) and are not able to either concieve or carry. We have decided that adoption is off the plate (just not for us personally), and if we had tried typical conventional methods, we would stop trying if it came to something like the situation you are asking about. We are just not comfortable with anything but traditional means of achieving conception & carrying.

Post # 36
Member
1796 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I would never do that. I’m not opposed to surrogates or using donor material, but I think doing it with a friend or family member is a recipe for disaster. There’s a lot of issues that come up between friends that wouldn’t be a problem when using an outsider.

Post # 37
Member
1796 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

View original reply
@Nona99:  Wow! You must have great genes 🙂

Post # 38
Member
2305 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

A close friend of mine who’s gay asked me if I would consider being a surrogate for him and his husband. I said yes, but only after I’ve had my own child. They were wanting to be a parent earlier then me and my SO, so they decided to go with someone else. It wasn’t a huge deal to me.

I’ve also considered giving eggs. I haven’t done it, but it’s something I would consider doing. Again, it’s not a big deal to me. However, I think my family history of mental illnesses may exclude me from doing it through a service. 

Post # 39
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

surrogacy – not in a million years. im in v v early stages of pregnancy and im already experiencing changes. itd be a major headfuck if i didnt get to keep a baby at the end

egg donations – im about 98% sure id say no. maybe for my sister but thats it. having someone who is genetically part of me running around but not raised by me…is an odd thought. also id have to be sure i was done having kids as obviously its a finite number

Post # 40
Member
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I’ve never been asked but he and I have discussed this, he is not into it at all!

I would be more open to it if it was someone that I was extremely close to but if it came to that and he was uncomfortable with it, then I wouldn’t.

Post # 41
Member
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’d donate an egg for my sister.  For anyone else? Not likely. EVER. NEVER EVER.

As far as being a surrogate, that would be hard.  It’s one thing to give up wine for your own baby, let alone for someone elses 😉 But in seriousness, pregnancy was hard on me, and I don’t know if I would ever want to do it again for someone elses benefit.  

Post # 42
Member
9544 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Never had anyone ask, but I’ve very seriously considered this. I’m too old to donate eggs anonymously (I’m 30) but if someone asked I’d donate eggs in a heartbeat. I’m a little more queasy about surrogacy, simply because I’m really super nervous about pregnancy and delivery. But I figure if having mine goes well, I’d probably consider doing surrogacy.

Post # 43
Member
730 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

@Nona99:  I am all for any couple who is mature and responsible enough to have children, to HAVE children any way they can. BUT…it’s not me. People who are giving and generous enough to do such a thing for infertile couples, are amazing to me. I personally am too limited in my thinking and beliefs to know that I would have a genetic child out there that I wasn’t parenting. Same goes for Darling Husband, no dice. 

Post # 44
Member
316 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would be okay being a surrogate for a family member, no to donating eggs or sperm. Well maybe only for my sister, but she has two kids so I’d never have to do that. I would never ask her to donate eggs for me. If she wanted to be a surrogate though I may weigh the pros and cons. 

Post # 45
Member
4953 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

FH and I were joking around about me selling my eggs for money (apparently you can make TONS), but I’m 98% certain I would never actually do it. It would be too weird knowing that, somewhere, there was a kid out there that was technically mine with another man, and I didn’t get to raise him/her.  

Post # 46
Member
2912 posts
Sugar bee

@Nona99:  I’m too old now but if I were younger I would consider being a surrogate or donating eggs for a couple if I had a close relationship with them and believed they would be good parents. I would also be okay with my husband donating sperm.

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