(Closed) How would you respond to this? (“We are only doing kid gifts this year”)

posted 8 years ago in Holidays
  • poll: If a family member told you they weren't doing adult presents, just kid presents this year, you'd:
    Feel great: one less adult gift to buy for THEM : (58 votes)
    51 %
    Feel ambivalent: who cares - their gifting won't change my gifting habits : (23 votes)
    20 %
    Feel annoyed: being kid-less, why do they need to tell me they aren't buying me anything? : (29 votes)
    25 %
    Other.... : (4 votes)
    4 %
  • Post # 47
    Member
    654 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I don’t understand this whole issue about the no reciprocation thing for couples that don’t have kids.  Again, it’s not about you, it’s about the kids.  We don’t have kids but have 5 nieces and nephews.  They all get gifts and we spend the same amount on each of them.  Never once have I thought I got the shaft b/c I don’t have kids.  When we do, they’ll get gifts.  Amongst my brothers and sister in laws, we just do a $10 white elephant gift and that’s it.  Honestly, it’s really fun to see what people can come up with.

    Actually, I think my mom and her sisters did it the best way I’ve ever seen it.  Amongst my mom and her 4 sisters, there are 17 kids.  All 17 names got put in a hat and each sister pulled out as many names as they had kids and bought only those kids a gift.  So we always got one gift from one of my aunts.

    Post # 48
    Member
    4485 posts
    Honey bee

    I wasn’t really sure how to vote in your poll. Either way, no one has the right to dictate how gift giving will be done. If someone else wants to give kid gifts only, then that is their right for them and their kids, not for everyone else in the group. If you choose to give gifts to everyone, no one has the right to make you feel guilty about it. Bottom line, the person dictating this “rule” is out of bounds.

    Post # 49
    Member
    2440 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @Meowkers: I completely agree.  My sisters have fought me on leaving the kids out of our gift exchange (they’re the only ones with kids) and have the adults do a gift exchange but all the adults buy their kids presents.  I get annoyed with it because it ends up with me buying gifts for all the kids and we get nothing because we have no kids.  I get more annoyed because my sisters buy gifts for other adults from the kids but I don’t get anything. And I know that sounds selfish but when this is how it is every year, it can add up and is just annoying. 

    Post # 49
    Member
    995 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    My family decided exactly this last year, and yes I find it slightly annoying. It is less expensive for us but I like to give and receive gifts. And not only is it a Christmas thing-but even for birthdays! So basically…I am NEVER getting a gift from my mom (or that side of my family) again for the rest of my life! Kinda depressing…

    Post # 50
    Member
    2440 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    @kelmac: Yes! That’s exactly how we are and it is sad.

    Post # 51
    Member
    1243 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    It wouldn’t bother me too much, but then it would have to be the same across the board.  I think that it’s horrible your sister said that and then proceeded to buy other adults presents, but left out you, your Darling Husband and other family members…to me, that means she’s using gifts as a way of showing her dislike or disapproval and that just sucks. 

    To me Christmas isn’t just about kids.  It isn’t about gifts.  It’s about family, friends, traditions, parties, spending time together, etc.  

     

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