(Closed) How Young Is Too Young?

posted 3 years ago in Engagement
Post # 31
668 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Just reading the first four sentences and the tone in which you wrote them in I can tell you are very young. 


ohhh nvm you are bat shit cray. 

Post # 32
717 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Considering something clearly does not add up here you are very clearly too young/immature to be doing any sort of getting married any time soon possibly?

If this is the true story I will add this: I thought I had met the one when I was young, we dated for a number of years and while the relationship ended because he wanted to date someone prettier I know now that I was far too young to truly understand what I needed out of a relationship.

Post # 33
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

OP, I say let it ride a little.  I was head over heels in love with my high school sweetheart.  We got together my junior year and stayed together through my freshman year of college.  He joined the military and we never saw or talked to each other.  That’s when I decided that I did want a little freedom and to explore other options before settling down. 

Looking back now, I’m glad that I didn’t take that option.  He’s still a very great guy and we might have been able to make it work later in our life but it just wasn’t meant to be at the time.

Now as for your situation, I don’t doubt that you guys are extremely in-love.  I do though think that you should take some extra time before you get married.  At least graduate college first and see where you each want to go in your lives before making that long committment.  If it’s meant to be, it’ll last for another 3-4 years.  Heck, there’s some of us older people that dated our significant others for 4-7-10 years or whatever, before we got married.

Post # 34
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

Darn…I typed that long response for nothing.  Great troll…

Post # 35
2168 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I knew my now husband was the one when I was 19 and he was 20. We didn’t get engaged until almost 3 years into our relationship and when I was done with school. For the record, I’m on the younger side when it comes to school, graduated high school at 17 and college at 21. We got married a year later at 22 and 24. The comments about being young weren’t much of an issue because we were an established (I use this in the sense of both worked full time, we financially on our own, lived in our own place, etc.) couple. I can see you getting these comments until you’re done with school and supporting yourselves. 

Post # 36
1291 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2018 - Omaha, NE

Short answer: 21. I always say if you’re not old enough to toast your marriage at your wedding, you’re not old enough to get married. 

I have a pair of friends who are middle school sweethearts. They started dating at the end of 8th grade (age 14). They got engaged at age 21 in their final year of college, married at 22 after graduating, and just celebrated their 10 year dating anniversary and 2nd wedding anniverary. Just because you “know” now doesn’t mean it isn’t prudent to wait until you are mature enough (and finacially secure enough) to get married. 

Post # 38
3381 posts
Sugar bee

Basically, when a Bee’s post starts with “Back in high school,” I don’t have much hope for whatever relationship they are now wondering about.

ETA: Woah, should have read everything before posting.

Post # 39
14 posts

What you know is not that he is for sure the one (he may be, he may not), what you really know is what your 19 year old self wants.  And for most people, myself included, I would never let my 19 year old self make such big decisions for my future.  

You also don’t know what you don’t know, so while this feels right and maybe even like destiny right now, you have no idea what the future holds for either of you, or the way in which you will be tested invidually or as a couple.  You will change between 19 and 24, 27, 31, etc.  You have to make the best decision you can at the time, with the information you have.  But the truth is, there’s no reason to make this decision now.  You have so much time to be married.

Post # 40
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2016 - Hunting Hill Mansion

When you forget to log out of your troll account lol

Post # 41
1869 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

emilypaige :  haha so embarrassing. I wonder if she’ll come back and try and talk her way out of it 🤔

Post # 42
640 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

People have too much time on their hands. 🙄

Post # 43
1165 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

sarajones :  You’re going to hear people tell you that you’re too young, and you’ll also hear people say to do what you feel is best. I know couples who met at 16 and were married at 18 years old, and they’ve been married for over 30 years and are quite happy. I’ve known couples who got married at 35 and it didn’t last more than a few years. 

I don’t think it always has to do with age when it comes to deciding if someone is ready to get married. I’ve known my fiancé since I was 18 and he was 21. We’ve been together for almost 4 years and have been engaged since April of this year. We’ve been through a lot though. We’ve faced incredible hardships together, have been through pre-marital counseling, have lived together for over a year, and we really waited until the timing was right for us. I graduated college, and he has had a stable job for over a few years.

For us, there was no rush and the timing was perfect. We have support from all our close friends and family. So honestly, I think you need to do what is best for you. If you truly feel that now is the time to be engaged, then go for it. If you feel that you should wait a while, there is no shame in that either. 

Post # 44
7425 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m going to ignore all the stuff about your previous threads and just answer this post…

To me, it’s not only the age but also the fact that you have only been together for a year. One or the other and i wouldn’t be so skeptical but the two together make me agree with those who say you’re too young.

Also, life significantly changed for me after college. Why the rush? Why not wait a few more years?

Post # 45
2333 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

You shouldn’t marry until youre grown up enough not to post long elaborate made up stories on a wedding website

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