(Closed) how’s this one for ridiculous?

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
124 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Ugh your dad’s cousin has some nerve! Here are some things I would consider doing:

-have your dad talk to him since you don’t know him well. he can *gently* explain the no kids rule to him. again.

-let him bring his son and be the only person with their kid there, and just let it go and be the bigger person

-if you have a day of coordinator there, she can explain the no kids rule at the door 🙂 

Good luck!!

Post # 4
452 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

arghhh! that is so frustrating. now, sit back, relax and take a breather.

i am in the same boat as you and anticipate one or two people doing the same thing. this is how i am going to handle it:

rude guest: i know the invite says adult reception, but can i bring my kid(s)?

me: not, it’s an adult reception.

rude guest: is it because of the cost? i can pay for my kid(s).

me: no, it’s an adult reception.

rude guest: ok. then, i can’t make it because i don’t have a sitter.

me: oh, well when i sent out the std’s 9 months a go, and the invitations 3 months ago, i specifically noted that it would be an adult reception so that people can make arrangements accordingly. i can help you find a sitter.

rude guest: no, i think we just won’t go.

me: well, sorry to hear that. thanks for understanding.

now, if i hear through the grapevine they are still planning on coming with their kid(s), i would call them (or have my parents, Fiance, or Fi’s parents call, depending on whose closest to them) and explain that it is an adult reception and it’s perfectly understandable if they can’t make it, but we will not tolerate their rudeness.

good luck!! maybe there should be a psa (public service announcement) for this?? ….lol.

Post # 5
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow. Have your dad take care of it—it’s HIS cousin. That makes you pretty extended relatives in the long scheme of things.

I’d definitely have the DOC or somebody at the venue stipulate that anybody with kids (besides the two in the wedding) are not allowed

If he shows up anyways, he’s going to look pretty silly trying to share his seat with a child, when obviously, you’ve called and so graciously explained to all the other parents.

He’ll just look like a big, rude, ignorant guest.

Post # 6
815 posts
Busy bee

You should ask your dad to call him.  I think that a phone call would catch him off guard.  Most people are not comfortable being called out for their poor judgement or ridiculous behavior.  I have a feeling that if your dad were to let him know that you are really concerned about this, he will rethink his decision.

Post # 7
792 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I think that is totally rude and very strange behavior on your cousin’s part. I feel bad for his son. I mean if this guy drags his uninvited son to your wedding he’s going to be bored to tears hanging out with a bunch of adults and probably feeling pretty awkward being the only kid there. Some people only think of themselves…

Post # 8
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

i agree, totally call the guy out on this one. i would have your dad phone him and ask are you planning on bringing your son to the wedding because its an adult event only.

do you have a DOC for the day that can stand guard and show them the door if they arrive on the day anyways?

geez, how rude – when did it become necessary to have security to guard a guest list!


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