HR Bees: Pregnant and Accepting a New Jobposted 4 months ago in Career
- 4 months ago
Congrats on your pregnancy!
A coworker of mine had the same thing happen to her. She wound up telling them after she got the offer and negotiated certain things with regard to her leave.
- 4 months ago
UPDATE: I was able to review their leave policies and they make it pretty clear that if you have not worked for the company for a year, you would not recieve paid maternity leave or have a guaranteed job when you return.
Because of this and advice from a few HR friends of mine, and other friends, I decided I needed to tell them about being pregnant and how it was important to me to make sure I protected the well-being of my family. I requested to negotiate adding maternity leave benefits into my contract, assuming my pregnancy goes to term.
I received this email back…
“First, congratulations! I’m so happy for you and your husband! Let me see if there is anything I can do. I’m not sure I’ll able to get this approved. I understand you have to look out for your family, but I have to look out for the business and have been burned before because there is no guarantee you’ll come back to us after maternity leave. Unfortunately, this is why the policy is in place. This may take a couple days but let me see what we can make work.”
I totally understand she’s been burned before, however I am the bread-winner of my family and have no desire to be a Stay-At-Home Mom. I reassured her I would be returning, but I guess all I can do now is wait and see.
- 4 months ago
tulipdazey : I hope it works out! One thing that you might be able to negotiate is that if you don’t return to work you have to pay back the benefits they paid for you while on leave. I know lots of places that have that policy (which I personally think sucks, but that’s not the point here) and it might make them feel more confident that you’ll return. HOWEVER – make sure that if you did back out that you could actually afford to do that. The employee I referenced earlier was a very driven career woman and her husband was a student. She still decided to become a Stay-At-Home Mom and they lived off family support/loans until he was done with school. It happens. We all think we know if we want to be a working mom or a Stay-At-Home Mom but a lot can change once that vision becomes reality.
Also I personally would be concerned about an employer who felt “burned” by women not returning from maternity leave. If it’s been a major problem for them then that makes me think they aren’t very supportive of working parents. I knew I wouldn’t be emotionally ready to return to work after 12 weeks and I told my employer that when I was pregnant. Because they aren’t idiots they granted me additional time off (unpaid) because, as one guy put it, “I can lose you for a couple months or I can lose you forever when you say fuck that place I’ll just quit and get a new job when I’m good and ready. I’d rather lose you for an extra couple months than forever”.
- 4 months ago
LilliV : Interesting enough… she got back to me right before you made your post…
“Unfortunately, we cannot move forward with adding a clause to your offer. However, you should know that [company name] is a very understanding and family-oriented business that has always rewarded and worked with rockstar employees when difficult situations arise. I can’t guarantee you paid leave at this time, but I can tell you [company name] values committed, hardworking employees and is always willing to make considerations for those individuals in times of need. I know you have a difficult decision ahead of you. I’m very excited for you and your family and hope you make the decision to join us. I don’t think you will regret it. Please let me know if you have questions. I’m happy to jump on a call as well if you’d like to talk. I don’t want to say I’ve been in your shoes, but let’s just say I was in a similar situation in the past if you just want to talk mom-to-mom (to-be!)”
The woman I am speaking to seems very supportive and she even seems to be suggesting that they will reevaluate the situation and figure out a way to work with me several months from now. At the same time, I don’t want to assume anything and then get “burned” by the company.
I think I am going to try to jump on a phone call with her tomorrow to see if she will have a frank conversation with me about all of this. She seems to be understanding and like she wants to make this work for me… but I also can’t take the chance of being screwed over 7 months from now.
I have also considered that if I do find out that they can’t work something out for me a few months from now, offering up alternatives such as giving up my vacation time so I get paid for at least part of my leave, offering to work from home for part of my leave, etc. so that I am not totally screwed. At the same time, I don’t want to offer up alternatives until I absolutely have to.