(Closed) Hubby gone to our 1st Christmas :-(

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
5107 posts
Bee Keeper

okay, normally, I get angry irate when people complain about their SOs being gone for Christmas (hubby is a fireman, he’s gone for these sorts of things frequently!) but in this case, that’s annoying.. I understand being excited about a truck, but that is just weird, why can’t he wait three days?!

Post # 5
1406 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@mrsbiddyf:  My Father-In-Law has a similar attitude. I think it has to do with the fact that he was divorced before (15+ years ago) and has an issue with women…and it doesn’t help that he considers Darling Husband his best friend. I’d be pissed too and your Darling Husband should put his foot down NOW.

My exH let his family control our holidays b/c we never were able to have kids.  Everything done had to be “approved” by his sister b/c she had a kid. It was one of the biggest reasons we got divorced…him not “seeing” us as a family and being separate from his family.

Post # 6
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

That is freaking ridiculous. I’m amazed that your Darling Husband did not immediately tell his dad he was crazy and that no, he would not spend his Christmas driving across the country for something that was not a huge emergency. It doesn’t even matter if he’s always buying crap he doesn’t need or not, it’s Christmas and your Darling Husband should be with you, his wife!

I am really hoping you update later today to tell us that your Darling Husband told him no, if I were you I’d be beyond pissed off if he actually says yes to this stupid request. 

Post # 7
688 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@mrsbiddyf:  I don’t think you asking your husband to be home for your first Christmas together is an unreasonable request. I would actually flip my shit if that was suggested, personally. 

Post # 8
9891 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@mrsbiddyf:   I would feel that’s completely unacceptable!  If your Father-In-Law wants a new truck he’s an adult and he can go get it on his own.  How selfish and rude of him to even ask.  That would totally piss me off beyond belief.  I hope you can talk your Darling Husband out of going!  Let us know.

Post # 9
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would definitely die down with your husband and tell him how important spending Christmas together is to you. I know holidays (especially religious ones) aren’t nearly as important to Fiance as they are to me. we had some problems our first Christmas together bout now that he knows how important those days and events are to me he’s been much better about it.

Post # 10
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

So he won’t be home to celebrate Christmas or this is happening before or after Christmas?  If he won’t be there to celebrate Christmas I think you need to talk to him.  Besides, doesn’t your Father-In-Law know there are blizzard conditions in the middle of the country right now??  There might be some areas where it will be illegal to be on the roads.  I think the Father-In-Law needs to re-think things.

Post # 11
3586 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2000

@mrsbiddyf:  I’m with you, it’s not an emergecny, so your Father-In-Law can find someone else to do it or hey, here’s an idea: do it himself. Fly to where the trcuk is and get it, drive it home.

I say this as someone whose Darling Husband is often away at Christmas visting his family, but I’m fine with it and we’ve had decades of Christmases to be togheter by choice.

Post # 12
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@mrsbiddyf:  my opinion is it’s your husbands choice to go or not. So it would be him ruining your xmas, not your father in law.  Don’t get me wrong, I’d be annoyed too but not at Father-In-Law. 

Post # 13
2188 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

If Darling Husband chooses to go across country for a freaking truck with his dad instead of spending it with you that is fucked up. You need to tell him that you want him with you on Christmas and his dad is super rude for even asking and not thinking of you.


Post # 14
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think you should talk to your Darling Husband – tell him you want to spend your first Christmas together! I would leave out your two other reasons as it’s easy for him or his dad to make excuses defend those. And I think it’s PERFECTLY acceptable to expect/want your HUsband home and he should understand that.

Post # 15
4 posts

 looking forward to your husband in time for Christmas and I spent with you.

Post # 16
580 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’d be super annoyed! I can see my Father-In-Law doing something like this….he doesn’t have a lot of male friends that he could ask to do something like this, so I can totally see him asking Darling Husband.

I was annoyed about a week ago because he told my Darling Husband they were going to be working on this old house every other Saturday for 3 months…Darling Husband told him no way, he could give him a day here and there, but he wasn’t promising more than that. I was irritated because my Father-In-Law knows that Darling Husband and I both work 40+ hours a week and Saturday and Sunday are pretty much all we’ve got.

LOL, sorry for my saga, I think we just have similar FILs!

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