(Closed) Huge dilemma family invites !

posted 5 years ago in Family
  • poll: What would you do ?

    Just have 2 witnesses and forget what anyone thinks

    Have both families there and risk an atmosphere

    Invite fiancés family and not my own

  • Post # 2
    Member
    1832 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Well, yes you can invite his family and not yours.  Will your family like that?  No, but they don’t seem to want to be involved with you or your child.  Why should your FI’s family have to suffer because you were stuck with a less than stellar family?

    Post # 3
    Member
    460 posts
    Helper bee

    Your family aren’t acting very family-like and don’t even make any effort to see your baby. I would have zero problem not inviting them.

    They obviously don’t give a crap about hurting you and are causing unneeded stress so why should you worry about hurting them?

    It would be different if you’d just recently fell out with your mum but as you said, it’s been going on for years and she wasn’t much of a mother.

    Post # 5
    Member
    2076 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Of course you can invite his family and not yours.  There is no rule saying that your sides have to be even in regards to who you invite.  Will you possibly piss some people off?  Sure.  But it doesn’t sound like you care to really have a relationship with some/most of the people in your family, so as long as you are okay with the fact that they may be upset, go ahead and not invite them.

    But, if you and your Fiance just want it to be yourselves and two witnesses, then do that.  Don’t let his one brother make you feel like you have to invite his family.

    Do you have close friends?  If so, invite them in place of your family.  People can be considered family even if they aren’t blood related.  So think about who in your life means a lot to you and invite those people.  

    Post # 6
    Member
    1832 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    Jesslovelock12:  I am not asking for any details but did something happen within your family to cause some kind of nuclear blowout?

    Post # 8
    Member
    1832 posts
    Buzzing bee

    The only advice I can give you is to think about the big picture and not just your wedding day.  Are you hoping for a relationship with your mom again?  Are you thinking of distancing yourself from her?

    have you sat down with her and had a clear talk about everything?  

    Think big picture here – do you want a relationship with these people or has that ship sailed?  Sometimes we come to the conclusion that we have toxic family members and we are better off cutting contact with them (I did that).  

    Take your wedding out of the picture and decide how you want your family to look, say 2 years from now.  Then, go from there.

    I wish you the best of luck.  You need to balance what is best for you and your family against the possibility of whether or not you will have a relationship with your mom and grandparents.  Good luck.

    The topic ‘Huge dilemma family invites !’ is closed to new replies.

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