(Closed) Hungover for the wedding

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Trippy1 has the right to be angry or is over reacting

    anger is justified

    Waaaaay over reacting

  • Post # 107
    Member
    5870 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

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    @trippy1:  Your friendis off base.  The problem is not that you are ok with strippers or not.  The problem is that you two discussed it, came to a decision, and then he completely disrespected that (both the strippers and the partying before the wedding), and then he and all his friends were total a-holes about it.

    Post # 108
    Member
    5870 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

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    @trippy1:  “The only way you can compare is if I put my self in the stripper place where I get completely naked and sub my crotch in a mans erection and rub my tits in a guys face.

    Very good point!

    Post # 109
    Member
    1744 posts
    Bumble bee

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    @trippy1:  I hope that you can come to some decisions and find peace whatever you decide.  There are a couple of decision points: The first being – what do you want.  (not what does you mom want, not what does he want)  Sometimes just making that decision can end some of the turmoil.

    Post # 111
    Member
    522 posts
    Busy bee

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    @trippy1:  No no, don’t feel like you have to explain yourself at all. I am totally aware that in the moment, a person would feel stuck or not even sure how to handle the situation. 

    However, now that you’re looking at all of this with a clear mind, I hope you will see that this issue was caused by an immature, inconsiderate a-hole who seems like he has some kind of personality disorder. You obviously deserve so much better, and I hope you see that too. 

    Post # 112
    Member
    13614 posts
    Honey Beekeeper

    i would not have gone through with the ceremony.  

    Post # 114
    Member
    522 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    @trippy1:  My grandmother has a personality disorder, so I’m pretty keen on what it looks like. From what you’ve described, they sound like very similar individuals. And what sucks even more is that there’s not much that can be done about it. 

    Post # 115
    Member
    151 posts
    Blushing bee

    Dont make your family with someone like this- repeated broken promises break kids hearts.

    I honestly would advise an annulment on grounds of fraud. He cheated the night before the wedding and you didnt know until after- that would probably be enough for the church. Is he going to say “well it was your idea to get married” everytime he fails as a husband? get out now!

     

    Post # 116
    Member
    2050 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

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    @This Time Round:  Love your response all around. Nicely written and I will look into your book suggestions, too. 

    View original reply
    @trippy1:  Follow This Time Round’s advice all the way. I’m sorry this happened to you but you can turn this around for yourself.

    Post # 117
    Member
    1317 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

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    @Audrey2_sings:  +1.  I would let him know you are seriously thinking about an annulment because you feel he has severely damaged your relationship and you can’t get past both that and how he feels that this is just “your” idea to get married and aren’t willing to be the partner you need him to be.  Ask him to think over going to counseling, but otherwise, you do not know if you can make this work and are sick of fighting but won’t be treated in such a way.

     

    Post # 118
    Member
    150 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2016

    Nope. His behavior is NOT ok and throws up tons of red flags left and right. The manner in which he did the bachelor party was really disrespectful to you and based on what you are saying here it seems like he lied to your face.

    I’m not saying leave him, but figure this out with him for sure. Him not wanting to talk about it is not an ok answer because it is soemthing that you, rightly so, are upset about and as your husban he should care that he pset you and want to make it right.

    Post # 119
    Member
    4687 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY

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    @trippy1:  This is going to sound harsh but your husband sounds like a real douche. It also sounds like marriage is not his priority. I think you should have s very serious discussion with him :/ He’s doing things purposely to hurt you and that is not a strong foundation of marriage.

    Post # 120
    Member
    594 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    @trippy1:  I read this to my Fiance and he is completely sick thinking about this man treating the woman he is supposed to love like this. He says that it is absolutely clear that this man has no regard for your feelings, and it’s hard to believe that he actually loves you if he is so willing to make you feel like this. He also says that this guy sounds like he’s a sophomore in college and just plays into what his “bros” tell him he should do, and that is NOT the kind of person to be married to. Your husband needs some serious help for this apparent personality disorder. Hopefully it’s something that can be worked out, but remember to put yourself and your feeling above everything else, don’t compromise your values for a guy who’s not willing to compromise for you.

    The topic ‘Hungover for the wedding’ is closed to new replies.

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