(Closed) Hurt & not sure what to do

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
164 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Sorry to hear your Maid/Matron of Honor is adding drama….most brides are already dealing with enough already. 

I think you were being respectful to all your bridesmaids by asking their thoughts and opinons and I did the same thing.  Is it because she is the Maid/Matron of Honor that she thinks she should know more/have more control than the others?

If she continues to act this way, I would just send my thoughts to the other bridesmaids and not her.

Post # 4
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Is she maybe having wedding envy?  Or thinking your wedding may be “better” then hers?  I’m sorry your under stress. My sis had a lot of Bridesmaid or Best Man drama so that is why I have decided to not have any! Lol. Hope this all works out for you and the she will get her panties out of a bunch. 😉

Post # 5
1199 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

@FutureMrsKoda: I think it is very nice that you are involving everyone in your decisions.  I have been emailing all of my BMs, though no one hits reply-all so I get to filter all the responses (not that there is anything bad).  I don’t see why she thinks its her place to tell you how many people you can email or how many times you can change your mind!

I would just tell her to back off or ignore her emails/comments about the negativity…

Good luck!

Post # 6
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

Clearly she’s never planned a wedding before.  Indecision is the only constant variable in wedding planning!  I can’t tell you how many times I’ve changed my mind about stuff, and I’m still not done.  I’ve “definitely” been getting married at about six or seven different venues all over my state.  I’ve “for sure” been planning to walk to down the aisle to about twenty different songs (changes every week).  I’ve known beyond the shadow of a doubt what my wedding colors are going to be…  It never ends!  Honestly, I think I’m still going to be changing stuff on the day of the actual wedding!

I would maybe just refrain from voicing your ideas to the BMs from now on.  When you finalize your decisions, then let them know what you’ve decided.  That way, they won’t know what all you’ve changed your mind about, and can’t talk crap about you for doing so.  My Fiance won’t even let me finish my sentences in regards to plans, anymore.  Instead he just says, “I don’t even want to hear it because next week it’ll be something completely different!”

Post # 9
5789 posts
Bee Keeper

I’m not really sure why you are trying to involve them in any decisions except maybe about their dresses and/or shoes. The rest of it should just be you and your Fiance or your Mom or coordinator. Most brides change their minds a million times before deciding on things, and I think its your prerogative.

What I think might make things harder and actually worse, is getting too many opinions about everything. That causes more indecisiveness than anything!

Post # 11
9816 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

“I don’t know what to do and I don’t know what her problem is.”

Ask her?

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