Hurt feelings over social media and photo

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
5707 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

Honestly I can’t relate to this at all, I find it completely bizarre that you are fine with him going to strip clubs but you slept in another room because he “liked” a photo of basically a mutual friend. 

Anyway, I think it does seem legit that he didn’t think this would hurt you and that he didn’t remember you telling him 4 years ago not to like photos of other girls. 

Post # 3
Member
9717 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

Personally, I think you are overreacting. He liked a picture of someone he knows. In no way would I take that to mean he thinks that chick is so much hotter than his girlfriend. And it doesn’t sound like he went out of his way to like the picture. It’s not an old one he had to go find, it popped up on his home page that’s not going out of your way. And he probably wasn’t even thinking about a comment you made years ago about not wanting him to like other girls’ pictires. It sounds like you are very insecure and this really seems like more of a you issue than a him issue.

My best friend also has issues with self-esteem/insecurity and had similar problems with her husband except he was liking other women’s photos frequently. They were constantly having arguments about it. Eventually they both just deleted social media altogether. But this doesn’t sound like a repeated problem for you so I would just accept his apology, move on, and work on building some self-confidence.

Post # 4
Member
9940 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

I think you’re allowing your insecurities to read more into something than what is possibly there.

Couldnt it just be as simple as:

”Oh look, Lucy took a beach vacation. That’s nice for her.” *like*

Instead of

”Omg that Lucy is so freaking hot I wish I could see what it’s like to be with her. Maybe if I just like this photo she’ll know I’m interested and my sewer troll girlfriend will be none the wiser!” *like* 

Please note, I’m not actually calling you a sewer troll but this seems like your imaginations thought process.

Post # 5
Hostess
1694 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

This is how social media destroys relationships. 

Post # 6
Hostess
8681 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: Dorset, UK

slomotion :  My friend once went a bit mad at me for liking her ex boyfriends picture, it was literally a picture of the him and some people on the beach and I was like “damn the beach looks nice”. She really did not like it. In her mind I was picking his side somehow?! Ugh, people. 

Post # 7
Member
1596 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

I agree with others. How is it possible you are “okay” with your bf going to strip clubs, as long as there are no lap dances which by the way, how would you know that? 

But him ‘liking’ an innocent picture of a friend isn’t OK? 

This strikes me as really controlling and really insecure. 

And once that boundary of him going to strip clubs was allowed, you opened yourself up for every other allowance a man may have. 

 

Post # 8
Member
571 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

This is so nothing to get your panties in a wad about. There’s either more you aren’t telling us, or you are WAY overreacting.

Post # 9
Member
889 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Mlim :   I’m sorry you feel this way. I think there must be something deeper going on here. Does your boyfriend post pictures of you on social media? Does he like pictures that you post? It sounds like there is more to the story. 

Post # 10
Member
3721 posts
Sugar bee

I once found that my husband would joke with his friends on a forum about girls they would “wife”, etc. they were generally models and porn stars. It hurt me deeply, because even though I trusted him, it felt disrespectful and to have mutual friends know he talks like that was icky. Now I know a lot of guys in solid relationships who will follow IG models and like skanky pics, and their SO’s don’t seem to mind, but it’s just not for me. I would probably just say look if you must, but don’t disrespect me in front of our friends and family by liking stuff like that, and I will do the same and not like pics of cute guys I see. 

Post # 12
Member
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

Sometimes we can’t control how we feel but we can control how we react to those feelings. From what you said in your post, it seems he didn’t mean to hurt you and was sorry he made you feel that way. If you know your relationship is stable than there is really isn’t a reason to make a big deal out of it

Post # 13
Member
3302 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

You are overreacting. 

Post # 14
Member
9940 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Mlim :  Okay, but how is a picture of a chick in a swimeear (I presume at a beach/lake/pool) sexual? 

I mean, I could perhaps understand it being sexual if she was like on a couch, spread eagle with her labia hanging out the side of her bikini bottom. 

Post # 15
Member
234 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2020 - Hopetoun House, UK

Mlim :  Finding it out of character is an acceptible reason to worry, but i feel like you are just being paranoid. 

If you trust him in any other instance it shouldnt be a cause of concern… even if it is his ex gf, she is an EX for a reason and your the one still with him 7 years later ❤️ Don’t let a post hurt you, and if it still bothers you I would speak to him, I’m sure he will let you know he meant nothing by it x

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