Hurt feelings over social media and photo

posted 1 year ago in Emotional
Post # 46
Member
461 posts
Helper bee

Mlim :  Only if it is a Bachelor’s party and no lap dance. I can’t say no if his friends are celebrating and have him sit at home. 

Oh yes, you can, and so – NEWSFLASH! – can he.

Post # 47
Member
1358 posts
Bumble bee

I always think life was so much easier before we all got into all this social media stuff.  I know Facebook has been around for a long time now, but I joined late.  I honestly wonder what I did with all my time before Facebook (LOL!), but obviously I kept myself busy and was happy and saw a lot less drama than I do now.  I can understand you feeling hurt about it, but when you are on Facebook or Instagram or any other social media site, it’s hard not to see all those things and “like” them. It’s human nature. 

Post # 48
Member
2131 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

I don’t care what my husband likes on FB and he doesn’t care what I like. I think you are worrying too much about this. It’s just social media. I’d just let it go. 

I wouldn’t allow the strip club thing, but that’s just me. 

Post # 49
Member
709 posts
Busy bee

This is so odd to me. No, I wouldn’t care if my Fiance liked another girls bikini picture. Hell, I have bikini pictures on FB and I had guys “like” them that were in relationships and I never thought anything of it and I don’t think their girlfriends did either. I think you are insecure about your body otherwise you wouldn’t have an issue with it. Also, just because it’s a bikini picture doesn’t make it sexual. If this was happening on the reg and you expressed your discomfort in it and he still did it then I would say he’s disregarding your feelings, but once in 7 years?? I think you are overreacting. 

Post # 50
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2018

Mlim :  I don’t peronally agree with what everyone else is saying. I can seriously see where you would be hurt and I would feel the same way. Having your man look at other woman such as strippers would bother me but the truth is they sort of see them as objects.. this hurts more because it is personal. 

You have every right to be upset and it’s ok. Perhaps talking to and explaing why it hurt you and trying to make sure you can avoid this type of thing in the future. 

Post # 51
Member
2572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Courthouse

I can totally understand where your insecurities lie. Sometimes when we see things like this we assume, oh my boyfriend must find her more attractive. My boyfriend must like that pic bc he likes her more than me, etc. These thoughts are destructive and not a clear cognitive process. Like PP stated, it’s more likely he just liked the overall picture. 

If this helps, you can flip the situation. I will sometimes “like” photos on Facebook of guys I briefly dated or had crushes on. Sometimes it’s their wedding pictures, pet photos, cool vacations, promotions, etc. Sometimes we like people’s pics because we are just happy for them. I also happen to like every single photo Orlando Bloom ever posts on Instagram. Do I find him gorgeous? Yes. Do I love him? Yes. But does that mean I want to leave my husband? No. 

It boils down to overreacting and thinking or assuming the worst. Unless he has previous behavior that states otherwise, you have to take it for what it is. He liked a photo. 

Don’t be so hard on yourself and try to imagine the flip side. It’s not as big of a deal unless you constantly think about it.

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