- 3 years ago
I don’t know how to approach this anymore.
Had a baby, stayed home on maternity leave for 3 months. He didn’t do a whole lot to help out. When I went back to work, we worked it out so I would take care of baby in morning, he drops her at day care, I pick her up, take care of her until he came home. He said he would care for her at night until midnight and I would do the early morning feed.
This plan went to shambles. I pretty much ended up doing most of the work with the baby. I ended up feeing her at night.
Now, he lists all the stuff he does in a day and tells me that’s why I should take care of the baby. Or feed her, etc.
He gets mad if I ask him to hold or feed her so i can do XYZ. He just lists all the stuff he does to make an excuse.
He randomly goes up to take a nap or bed early and abandons me to take care of the baby myself. he will do this too if he is mad about something small. He flips out, stomps around and runs to the bedroom and goes to sleep.
ive tried to reason with him. Try to have an adult coversatioN. I’ll do X while you hold baby. So you can do Y. And swap off. Nope this isn’t acceptable either. I get an IM TIRED. And basically says he doesn’t want to help.
Today was bad. baby is teething now and very fussy at times. He left to go wash the car and clean it. He calls me about an hour and a half after he left. Asked what was going on. I said not much, couldn’t do as much as I wanted because baby was fussy. He said: UGH.
Basically insinuating I don’t do anything. I flipped. I told him how difficult it is to get things done with a fussy baby. And don’t talk to me that way.
He came home and acted like nothing happened. No apologies.
So I just said look we have A lot to do today, let’s swap off and we can get a lot done. It was working fine, up until after dinner. I was going to puree some pears I steamed. Asked him to hold her/feed her and id be done in 15 mins. He threw a fit. Basically stompped upstairs and went to bed. It’s only 7pm.
I was like WTF.
I go up to talk to him and it turns into yelling. He said well I did XYZ and you just want to do all this stuff.he said I was wacked and crazy because I wanted him to take care of the baby. He didn’t get any time.
now I am angry because we agreed we had a lot to do. We agreed to swap baby to get what we needed to done. And as soon as he doesn’t feel like it, he quits. Checks out.
He doesnt seem to step it up. I dunno how to approach this anymore