(Closed) Husband chooses brothers graduation over birth of his first child :O

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 137
1213 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@dodgercpkl:  I agree! I’m not even married or pregnant, but I just told my SO and asked him what he thought and he said hands down he’d be there for the birth. If a man loves you he should get it, first baby or not!

Post # 138
7643 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Cory_loves_this_girl:  “I’m sorry, but through this post and some of your previous posts, your husband has shown himself to be an immature, selfish asshole.”

Good catch! For those of you who’ve been here a while, this husband is the same as the immature man child who wanted to go out with buddies 5 nights a week while his wife is pregnant and minding one child: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/need-advice-dh-and-i-have-been-arguing-all-week#axzz2qogfuXD7

The one bright spot I can see is that you both go to church, and he’s reasonably involved there. OP, can you get him to talk to the pastor? Churches are usually pretty strong on fathers’ responsibility to their wife and children, so maybe the pastor can talk some sense into him.

Post # 139
2432 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

After reading your second post, he definitely needs to be there for you — for the practical reason of getting you to the hospital so you could avoid a costly ride in an ambulance to make it to the delivery room!

What is the plan if you haven’t yet gone into labor before the graduation? I would be asking my Darling Husband to stay home, even if I didn’t have any signs of labor yet, given how far away the drive is for the graduation ceremony.

Post # 140
1212 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@mdcmod:  +1 He needs to be there. The fact that this is even a question is appalling to me. 

Post # 142
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

I’m so glad that this is working out!!! Sometimes people just don’t think things thru, I’m glad he is seeing it now.  Good luck with everything.

Post # 143
11746 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Mrslovebug:  I’m so glad you had the courage to put your foot down and tell him what you need! Men can be really dense sometimes and they definitely respond better to directness instead of beating around the bush and trying to get them to read your subtle hints about what you want. Glad he responded well and isn’t the jerk he was seemingly being for a few days there! Good luck with your pregnancy and delivery!

Post # 144
2587 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - UK

@Mrslovebug:  I’m glad you’ve come to a good resolution – particularly given the further details you’ve given in the update, it does make much more sense for him to skip the graduation. I hope it all goes smoothly from here on in! 🙂

Post # 145
866 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@Mrslovebug:  Whooooa, just NO!!! I wouldn’t be pissed, most of all I’d be really sad because I’d feel that he neither cares enough for me nor the baby.

Obviously, I am going to need his support (even without all your extra “complications” like the epilepsy, babysitter, etc.) more than his brother.

And honestly – the first time his baby sets “foot” onto this world. He wouldn’t mind missing this? I’m tearing up here just at the thought of it. So NO, just NO!

Glad you were firm and he understood finally 🙂

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