MemberYou didn’t say if the graduation is local. If it is, there’s almost no chance of the baby actually being born in the few hours the graduation ceremony is happening. I wouldn’t worry about an extremely unlikely hypothetical, esp since this is your first child, you’re likely to go past your due date. Good luck, and don’t let this be a point of stress for the next 4 months.
Memberi think he needs to be there for YOU because YOU need his support while having your child!! i would be so mad!
Member
MemberI’d be upset with my DH if he thought it was okay to miss the birth of our child. With that being said, I’m guessing you two haven’t taken any tools for labor classes yet have you? I think once DH learns how important his role is as your support person for labor that his perspective will change. My sister asked me the other day if my husband knew that I expected him to be in the delivery room when we have our baby and I was like “of course & he’s planning on being there.” She was like “okay good, just making sure.” Also, since you have some time before baby arrives it might be a good idea to make friends with some neighbors or parents of your daughters classmates just so you do have a back up system in place, somewhere for your 6y/o to go if you go into the hospital at 2am or someone to call and have come over.
MemberWow. There are a LOT of responses, so I’m sure mine will get lost in the mix. Buuuut – no. Absolutely not. This might not be real to him yet, but he’s coming off extremely insnsitive. This is the first time his child will be coming into the world. This is the baby’s first chance at meeting his or her father. And not to mention YOU need him there, and for him to think you’d be a-okay with doing this all on your own is crazy.
Member
MemberMember@Mrslovebug: The man better be joking! Yes, the baby won’t remember but he’s there to provide support for you. You do not need emotional support at a frigging university graduation. I’ve had one, about to have another and I didn’t even see or speak to my family members/DH the whole time!
Member
MemberI’m sorry, but through this post and some of your previous posts, your husband has shown himself to be an immature, selfish asshole. Not sure why you put up with his behavior…
MemberHe needs a smack in the face to bring him back into the reality of marriage and commitment.
Member@Mrslovebug: I think you’re very cool for not being upset: I’d be livid if he even thought for a minute that he might choose anything other than being with me during the birth of any child.
As much as I am a relatively independent person, I didn’t marry my husband so we can walk through life changing events solo. My husband is my best friend (my best adult friend, because my five year old is also my best)–
I guess I know my husband well enough to know that he wouldn’t choose a graduation me, period (within reason)– you can video the graduation and watch it later. I guess I can’t imagine his brother being OK with him choosing graduation over the birth of his child.
I sincerely commend you for handling the whole situation as you are!!
MemberUhhh, what??!?? This man sounds so selfish, I cannot believe he is anywhere near ready to be a decent father. Seriously, now that he has made a tiny human, wifey and baby come before all else. Take him to the Dr. and see if they can remove your husband’s head from his arse before you give birth. Otherwise, I think you’re essentially going to end up being a single mom.
Memberjust want to say that I agree with previous posters that he just doesn’t get it yet- he hasn’t thought through all the health, emotional and practical ramifications. personally, a lovely husband – who is now an amazing father- did something similar to one of my best friends when she was 38 weeks pregnant. She was furious and he totally regrets it- but such an error does not necessarily doom him as a terrible husband or father in my opinion- just a husband who is currently making a very bad call. thinking of you OP- people are outraged because they sympathise x x x
MemberTo those saying he doesn’t get it yet… I’m in my 3rd month of pregnancy. I’m not due until August, and my husband read this thread and said “What the hell is he thinking??” 3 months in and my hubby gets it perfectly. It’s not even about whether the baby will care or the wife, the fact is that one day HE”LL look back and highly regret not being there.
I get that you want to cut him some slack, but so far his further responses haven’t made me feel one bit better about his reaction overall. I hope he comes to his senses and realizes how much he doesn’t WANT to miss the birth!!
The topic ‘Husband chooses brothers graduation over birth of his first child :O’ is closed to new replies.