(Closed) Husband forgot to turn and watch me walk down the aisle? :(

posted 4 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
1046 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

Maybe you can go to Vegas to renew your vows on your anniversary and do it again.

Post # 3
10540 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I think it’s a cute, funny story. I think you just have to accept that he didn’t see you walk down the aisle and that now you have this adorable little story to tell about it. 

Post # 4
1582 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Why would you dwell on what was missed for a month instead of celebrating the joy of the ceremony itself? He was nervous and if you could have done it differently you would have, but it’s time to let it go. If this is the biggest regret of your wedding, you are two lucky people. You’re married. You had a beautiful ceremony for the two of you. It was a walk. It’s not like he forgot to say “I do!”

Post # 5
812 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

This is so not worth worrying about. I get that you’re disappointed, but this whole “OMG the look on his face when you walk down the aisle!!” thing just strikes me as a bad Pinterest trend that puts too much pressure on people who really should just be focusing on the fact that they’re getting married. Try not to let this bother you, and just remember the good things that happened. It sounds like you had a lovely day otherwise.

Post # 6
1969 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

This is what you have to figure out what to cope with? Wow. So not a big deal. 

Post # 7
1082 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

But if no one else was there, what was he looking at while here comes the bride played? The officiant was facing you, no? 

Don’t dwell on it, it’s just a funny story to tell later on. He still got to see you all beautiful and was surprised. 

Post # 8
971 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I’m sorry!  But I promise that moment doesn’t affect what happened that day!  You still got married and it will be a cute story once you get past the regret of it.

FWIW, remember Will and Kate’s wedding?  Apparently there are some traditions/cultures where the groom actually doesn’t turn around to watch her come down the aisle…so just think of it as a touch of your own royal wedding?? 🙂 

Post # 10
13903 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You can’t change the past.  You have a cute story for later on, and you got to see his surprised (and happy!) face when you got to the altar.

No need to be fretting about this a month later!

Post # 11
4252 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2009

I think it is cute that he was so nervous he forgot to turn and look.  I would not be worrying about this.  It is one day, and like 20 seconds of that day!  I can’t even remember my saying my vows now.  Neither can my DH.  We were both so nervous, the whole thing is like a blur.  The best is yet to come.  😉

Post # 12
9521 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Why didn’t the officiant tap him with a “hey buddy, look over there”? Odd. Make it a special moment for a renewal. 

Post # 13
5870 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

View original reply
catlady01:  I’m sorry you’re disapointed!

But…that’s life!  Sometimes not everything goes just as you wished.  If I were you’d I’d try to think of things that did go well on the day, especially little moments that you didn’t anticipate that you’ll treasure.  Try to focus on these positive moments rather than those that didn’t live up to expectations.

Post # 14
1939 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

View original reply
catlady01:  I completely understand your regret and how this was not one of the things you had ever expected could go wrong. At my wedding I had very clear instructions sent to every person in the bridal party plus the music coordinator and the venue coordinator – in spite of this, my processional music, Mendelsohns Bridal March, was started in error before I was coming into the church by someone at the door giving signal to the organist confusing him about his actual cue. The music was stopped. I heard it happening because the church door was opened for a moment while I was waiting for my bridesmaids whose transport got few minutes delayed. Then, someone at the door again instructed the processional music to begin a Second time Not on cue confusing the organist even more making him panic and think he somehow missed the real cue a second time). This time when the music began, my Mother-In-Law and Father-In-Law processed through the aisle and took their seats, stealing my entry. The music, unbeknownst to me that it had even started (a second time) kept playing and when the church doors opened for me, the music was halfway through and what I would call “nothing special” eg the grand entry notes that makes everyone stand up and turn around for the bride were well and truly through because my Mother-In-Law got her audience for that. 

I was basically cheated of my carefully chosen and planned processional and will never have a chance to relive it the right way. 

I’m really empathetic to how you are feeling. I don’t really have a solution beyond that you can re-do the moment for an anniversary vow renewal. I’m still trying to think if I can change how it happened at my wedding in video editing…we didn’t have a videographer though so it’s just cell phone low quality video to work with…not ideal..

I don’t know if you have the same feeling as me that someone should confess to messing up (giving the wrong instructions or interfering with the plan) and say sorry to you, that’s how I feel…

The typical reaction seems to be that “you got married, it was so beautiful, nobody knows but you it wasn’t totally to plan…” but I think that’s bs  I can see in video photage the confused faces of the guests at the processional starting and my f*ing parents in law processing down the aisle when they should’ve been seated as guests long before that to a SILENT CHURCH.

Bee, we can be upset together here *hugs*

Post # 15
586 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

There are bigger fish to fry dear.

– He was surprised when you arrived. Thats great. 

– Don’t worry about this. Focus on making your life great together. Dwelling on things you can’t change will only bring you stress. Life will hand you a lot of stress. This is not a big deal. 

– If you are still stewing over it several years from now- do a vow renewal in a nice gown and make sure he watches you walk down!

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