Post # 76
valentine2016: my Darling Husband is more of a guy’s guy…the only female friends he associates with are his friends girlfriends who are brought out to our group events. so it would strike me a little weird if he would want to have lunch with a girl all of a sudden, as i know he doesn’t have his own female friends.
on the other hand, Darling Husband is fine with me going out with my guy friends. he knows all of them and that we have a shared history. i find now that we’re married though, we tend to do things together with couples anyway rather than separately.
Post # 77
valentine2016: Well I have male friends and he has female friends and we don’t expect the other to be around when they hang out. I trust him to not have anything happen and to be honest with me, as I am with him.
However, I would feel uncomfortable if he was hanging out alone with a woman who has expressively shown to want to be with him. For obvious reasons! And then I would hope he would respect my feelings on it. Though I am not one to tell him what to do, we are a partnership-not me bossing him around.
Post # 78
I don’t have any close male friends and he doesn’t have any close female friends. We prefer it that way, because it doesn’t leave room for questions or overthinking. It would be weird if he wanted to suddenly have lunch with a woman. That is an absolute no.
Post # 79
- Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman
Lunch with a female friend is really not a big deal to me unless maybe they have some kind of history or she has expressed romantic interest in him, in which case I would have some follow up questions in regards to the reason for the lunch and if he really thought it was a good idea. I trust him and honestly I can’t imagine him ever engaging in an inappropriate situation.
Post # 80
I wouldn’t think twice about it.
valentine2016: What do you mean this is a cultural issue?
Post # 81
Meeting an opposite sex friend for lunch, purely for social reasons? That’s called a date. I wouldn’t try it and neither would he.
Post # 82
- Wedding: June 2015 - Malibou Lake Mountain Club
valentine2016: im ok with it. My husband has one close friend he has had since college; she was his groomsmaid too at our wedding. Shes also been with her husband since high school. those two are good buds.
my friends tend to be males too; one was my man of honor And we have been friends since high school. I hang with him and we have a mutual respect for each other and our significant others.
I guess we just trust each other and i know as much as he knows IF we were to cross the line, it wouldnt be with them lol.
Post # 83
princessandthepear: Traditionally, in my culture (Samoan) it is considered disrespectful to your husband/wife to be alone with somebody of the opposite sex unless it is family. It is not a trust issue, it’s just to do with respect.
Sure, we have female/male friends … I guess we just unconciously avoid spending time alone with these friends, so I put it down to it being a “cultural thing” 🙂
I have enjoyed reading the varying views on this topic! It really shows different people have a different idea of what is ‘appropriate’ to them, and there is no right or wrong answer.
Post # 84
- Wedding: May 2017 - Northern Territory, Australia
I voted other because it depends on who the woman is, if they are alone in a room with only them or alone in a crowded room etc.
Generally I am pretty easy. But if I feel there is a need for concern then I will voice it.
Post # 85
It really depends on the woman and my feelings towards her.Majority of the time I’m all for it,but there are a few womenhe knows he can’t be alone with.I trust him but don’t trust certain women.
Post # 86
Half my husband’s friends are women he’s known since uni days, I know them too and we all meet up as a group when everyone’s about. So I’d have no problem with him meeting them (that and nearly everyone’s married now anyway).
Post # 87
Nope. Nope. Nope. Not cool. Not okay. Not right.
But you’re right, it has nothing to do with control or trust or whatever negative spin other people try to put on it. It’s a respect thing, and in your case, a cultural thing, too.
No matter the reasonsing, if one spouse isn’t okay with it, then the other should respect that.