Post # 1
We have been married not even 6 months. We had a row yesterday and he left and wouldn’t answer any of my calls or messages. He’s just called me and told me he wants to split with me and wont tell me where he spent the night/day. He is always going off when he have rows and i never know where he is. I love him, I vowed to stay with him no matter what and I don’t want to split up, I want to work through whatever this is.
He got nasty on the phone so I said to call back in a couple hours when he’s calmed down, however I tried calling him back and he’s gone back to ignoring me again. I dont know what to do.
Post # 2
This relationship sounds super toxic. It’s admirable that you took your vows seriously and want to stay with him no matter what, but he clearly doesn’t feel the same way. Walking out on the relationship whenever you have a fight, giving you the silent treatment, etc. – all of that is textbook emotional abuse. As much as it hurts now, you’re better off without this mofo in your life.
Post # 3
When we have a fight one of us leaves before things get really heated (usually him). We always make sure to discuss it when we have calmed down and are ready. Our pre marital councillor said that while he would not recommend this to everyone it seems to be working for us.
Is this how you normally communicate? Was the fight about something stupid or relationship altering stuff. Its not cool that he was nasty and wouldn’t tell you where he spent the night.
Post # 4
If he’s determined to end the relationship, there’s nothing you can do. He’s handling it very badly, but if he wants out, he wants out.
I know you’re hurting terribly, but he doesn’t sound like much of a prize.
Post # 5
What was the fight about?
How long does he usually stay away when you’ve had a fight like this?
Have you ever asked him when you’re not fighting where he goes?
Post # 6
How devastating. It sounds like you’ll be better off without him. He doesn’t know how to fight in a healthy way and he’s extremely immature. He wants a divorce- give him one. Make sure you have great representation and someone to look out for you in the process. He seems like the type to fight dirty.
Post # 7
Wow that would be super upsetting. Did he handle rows like this before you got married!?
Post # 8
What a horrible way to deal with things… Has he always been this way?
Post # 9
Leaving should not be an option in arguments. It’s cowardly and childish. The fact that he is secretive about where he spends his nights when he takes off is sketchy AF. This behaviour is a giant red flag and would have been a deal breaker before marriage was even considered.