Husband in business class while I'm in economy?

posted 6 months ago in Travel
  • poll: What would you do if hubby flies business but you can only afford economy?
    Sit in economy while he sits in business : (40 votes)
    17 %
    Ask him to sit in economy with you : (64 votes)
    27 %
    Ask him to pay for your upgrade : (78 votes)
    33 %
    Other : (57 votes)
    24 %
  • Post # 136
    Member
    1255 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    This is nuts to me. My husband is 6’5″ and broad-shouldered and makes double what I make and he would never in a million years suggest that I sit in economy while he got the upgrade. Either we both sit in economy or we both would sit in business. We’re married so we’re a team. Our finances are separate but still we look at it like “we can’t afford business class” not “I can afford business class but she can’t.” Any luxury I have he should have and vice versa. I think looking at it like “I make more money so I deserve business class and she doesn’t” is a really good way to breed resentment in a relationship. If my husband held how much more he makes over my head I’d be out.

    Post # 137
    Member
    483 posts
    Helper bee

    Idk what is the issue of saying his height. A bunch of people asked and when you finally answered, it was “not that tall that business would be a necessity”. Why not just say his height? Your main reasoning in the first post for him wanting business what because of his height.

    Personally, me and my husband like to sit together during flights and we would never get separate class tickets and sit apart from each other.   

    Post # 138
    Member
    372 posts
    Helper bee

    NikkiBee18 :  Nuts is right! According to some people’s logic, based on what you have described you should be in economy and your Dh should be in business class. You should be eating Raman noodles and he should be eating steak and you should be riding a bicycle while he drives a Tesla. After all, he makes twice as much as you. Sounds silly doesn’t it?

    Post # 139
    Member
    1255 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2018

    beantime :  Right? It’s like if my husband and I bought a house based on our combined income and my husband said I was only allowed to access part of the house because I make less.

     

    Post # 140
    Member
    2395 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    This is weird. You’re going on a $2000 vacation but are spending $6000 for one seat on the airplane? Huge waste of money.

    Post # 141
    Member
    4057 posts
    Honey bee

    I don’t know what to think of this. I prefer first/business class on long flights overseas. Otherwise I get to the destination and my neck is killing me for 3 days thanks to 3 car accidents where I was not the driver. So we try to make that happen, but it doesn’t always work out. Last summer we flew to Barcelona with my Mother-In-Law and her boyfriend. I don’t recommend air travel with confused octogenarians. My Mother-In-Law wanted her dim bulb friend to make the reservations. She was paying for some of the trip so I acquiesced but told her we should really get business seats. So of course we wound flying coach and I was fit to be tied. My husband is useless in scenarios like this but I made it clear I would never again allow anyone to make my travel plans and then got on the phone. I wrangled one upgrade to first class so I told my Mother-In-Law she should take it. She agreed and then backed out, she didn’t want to be separated from her boyfriend. Ok, fine. My daughter wanted it, but I played the old card and the young whippersnapper got coach. My husband stated it didn’t matter to him, I should take the seat, and then he and his mother spent days complaining about their backs and telling me I was right. Guess what? I usually am. I keep waiting for them to figure that out. I’m surprised I got back from this trip with my sanity intact, probably because I flew there and back in first class lol.

    So I’m used to life being unfair, shit happens, but I think your husband could at least make the gesture that you have the first class seat on the way there and he has it on the way back. There’s always a middle ground. 

    Post # 142
    Member
    1464 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2018

    This is so bizarre to me.

     

    I have a demanding job. I work extremely long hours and I make good money for it. My husband has a less demanding job and makes less money. But it’s all OUR money. He has the flexibility to leave work early to take our dogs to the vet, or be home for workers who come over, or to get the grocery store to pick up dinner. I’m stuck at work late and much less help with the day to day running of our household. It’s AWESOME that my husband is more available.

    My husband also is quite tall, so when we travel we upgrade our seats so he is more comfortable. Because I make more money, should I tell him to go sit in economy? Since it’s not HIS money, does he not deserve to sit with me?

    We have NEVER had a my money/your money attitude. We have a single bank account and share our credit cards. We discuss purchases together. We decide what we can afford together. Just because it isn’t your job that brings in the most money doesn’t mean you aren’t equal partners in deciding how it’s spent. I would never have married a person who saw it any other way.

    Post # 143
    Member
    768 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    Are you buying the tickets at the last minute or something? I travel to Europe from the US in business every two weeks and my tickets never cost more than 3k and that’s at the very last minute. They usually hover around 1.5k

    Post # 144
    Member
    237 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I voted other. We share money – everything goes into one pot.

    We earn similar amounts, but I honestly can’t envision either one of us wanting to sit apart from the other because someone earns more than someone else. That doesn’t sit well with me. 

    Post # 145
    Member
    1116 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2019 - USA

    Um, just because one spouse earns more does not mean they deserve a better seat… it means they’re a selfish asshole who doesn’t care about their spouse’s comfort as much as they care about their own. It shouldn’t matter who earns more- both spouses should take care of each other equally with their COMBINED income. That’s what marriage is…

    Post # 146
    Member
    7813 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    katecod12 :  Seriously? I have never seen this…tho we are flying to the Middle East from the U.S., so a bit further. What airline are you flying that you can score business class tix between Europe and the U.S. for $1500? I just did a random search to major Euro cities for June flights and the cheapest economy ticket I’m seeing is $1400! Maybe I am not looking in the right place.

    ETA: It also depends which cities you’re flying to/from obviously. Our U.S. city doesn’t have direct flights to Europe so tickets are a lot more than flying out of NYC or something. Maybe that’s the case for the OP too?

    Post # 147
    Member
    768 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    tiffanybruiser :  that is very likely the case! I fly out of JFK or BOS on British airways or delta and it’s always pretty reasonable. I just booked our honeymoon to Greece as well and that was also like 3k a person for first 🙂 I watch flights like a hawk and use a variety of direct booking, hopper and the major 3rd party sites! 

    Post # 148
    Member
    7813 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    That’s amazing. I definitely would have paid that for our honeymoon. katecod12 :  

    Post # 149
    Member
    306 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2025 - City, State

    Just FYI, the $200/day equals around $50,000 per year, which could easily be a full-time job.  This is a little on the higher end for the teacher / social worker type careers that were hypothesized earlier in the thread (depending on area of the country).  His up-to-$1800/day means he’s probably pulling in somewhere in the range of $400,000 per year, depending on how much overtime he works and what percentage is base salary.  Her job being lower paying and him working overtime doesn’t necessarily mean that she works part-time for a pittance.  Her contributions to the household could be very much in the range of average, his (financial and hours worked) are just unusually high.

    Post # 150
    Member
    282 posts
    Helper bee

    bougainvillea :  How many hours per week, on average, do you work? How many hours do each of you typically spend on housework, financial management, and childcare? I think the effort you’re putting in matters more than the paycheck you bring home; if you’re both contributing equal effort, you should be enjoying the same lifestyle. If he’s putting more work into the relationship or into your shared life, it’s fair that he should get more out of the perks like luxury seating. 

    I totally get how it’s a dick move to tell the woman who’s raising your kids to go sit in coach, but it’s also kind of a dick move to work part time with no other responsibilities while your spouse busts his/her butt to pay the bills.

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