Post # 31
Do you guys really need cable because if you’re in such a tight financial spot, that’s considered a “luxury” expense. My H and I did not have cable and only had the most basic WiFi for many years when we were struggling.
Also, your H needs to stop waiting before he takes action in finding a job – like waiting to hear back from a potential employer, waiting to ask friends about jobs because he has too much pride, waiting for this, waiting for that ….. honestly you guys will be waiting forever with that strategy. He needs to do everything he can NOW today and not put off till later waiting for something to happen, because I guarantee you will spend all of his 401(k) at that rate and it still won’t be enough.
Post # 32
Why don’t you both look into serving or bartending? I know you say you’re not interested in doing anything but childcare but if you’re desperate for money it’s a good way to bring in income. I worked as a bartender while I was doing my masters and sucked having to do it but I made really good money. And most restaurants are almost always hiring. Good luck!
Post # 33
As a last resort, is there any chance he could get his previous job back?
Post # 34
He is finally starting to get call backs and has another 3 interviews this week for random jobs he applied for so we are hoping with these 3 and the last 2 he interviewed at that one of these jobs will bite. Yes, his last resort is going back to his old job even though he doesn’t really want to but he knows he will have to and I just hope if it leads to that, that they take him back.
I have faith that he can get another job, but the waiting for that call back with a job offer is so stressful. I am against him pulling from his 401k and will do my best to not let that happen. Once I’m done with school this semester (2 weeks) I’ll start picking up more nannying during the week and on weekends. That’ll be an easy 300 plus a week on top of what I already get during the week.
What makes this so hard is that I am on the verge of a huge meltdown and I just feel suffocated with him being around all the time now so I guess that’s why I’m even more frustrated that he isn’t working. I haven’t had the chance to even properly process our fertility issues because I’m having to keep encouraging him and telling him that he will find something or reading over his resume and thank you emails or job applications which of course I’d do for him because that’s my husband and I love him but part of me just wants to tell at him to grow a pair and to trust his instincts and to just have more faith in himself. He just requires so much validation and it’s draining me. I sound so selfish, I know, but i just want things to be normal already. I see his potential but I just wish he could see what I see in him. I’m all over the place sorry but that’s just how I feel right now. I can’t even think clearly because I’m trying not to freak out and to just remain in control of everything and it’s just too much for one individual. Deep down I know we will be fine, we have been through worst together and have come out fine in the end.
Thank you all for your input, advice, and your opinions. It really does help put things into perspective when you hear it from someone else especially since we haven’t told our families about this. It’s also nice to be able to vent to someone besides my friends or my husband.
Post # 35
he needs to be a waiter or delivering pizzas in the meantime. Literally anything. Have him try to do that, or call a temp agency.
Post # 36
how many interviews has he been on that didn’t lead to jobs? Perhaps a look into his interviewing style would help. I used to be a hiring manager and I could tell within 3 minutes who wanted THIS JOB, who wanted ANY job, and who was just there to show someone at home that they were “trying”. There is a clear difference between enthusiasm and desperation – make sure he’s giving off the former vibes.
Post # 37
He has been to 2 interviews since he just started actively searching last week. One job told him they’d contact him but they still haven’t and the other one he did an initial phone interview and she asked him for a web interview so he did, and then for an in person interview with another manager yesterday which he says he thinks went really well and was told they would contact him in a day or so. They had him shadow one of their sales reps but I’m not sure if that’s something they do with everyone or only if they are interested in the candidate. He is very good at doing his research about the companies, he doesn’t like going in not knowing anything about the company and I think that’s a good thing but then again I’m not a recruiter or anything.
Post # 38
I’m so sorry, Bee. It does sound like a confusing situation not just the typical “my husband doesn’t want to work” kind of a post.
I agree with PP that it would be better to find other places hiring so you aren’t so financially stressed. I understand how rough that would be, as my DH makes way more than I do.
I also wouldn’t worry about his background. My DH has a stupid dui from when he was 18. He was driving and way under the legal limit but he was a minor so he was charged. That was about 12 years ago but the whole time he hasn’t been turned down for jobs because of it. I would highly recommend your husband think about sales. You can make great money if that’s his cup of tea!