Husband, sister, 3some update.

posted 1 year ago in Relationships
Post # 61
Member
942 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

worriedgal :  you sound like a wonderful, smart and kind person and I hope you have some great friends and support system.

I am so proud of you standing up for yourself, if you ever want to chat then just DM me, I can be a good penpal and if you ever come to Toronto, Canada let me know!

 

Post # 62
Member
1993 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

worriedgal :  omg I can’t believe that your mother thinks you all should support them!  FUCK THAT.  Cut them all off for now…. the last thing you need is to be drawn into hearing about them in any way!

Focus on getting that shark of a lawyer, and like PP mentioned, please check out SurvivingInfidelity.com.  There are some great resources there and forums full of people with GREAT advice who have been through similar things.

Big hugs to you! xoxoxoxox

Post # 63
Member
745 posts
Busy bee

Hun, I’m SO sorry. And honestly, I’m so glad you’re strong and capable of cutting them off. You’re a brave and courageous woman who won’t take shit from anyone!

I can already tell you’re gonna have such a wonderful and happy life without them. I can’t wait for your sister to realize how miserable her life is when she’s raising a child with a man she’s no longer attracted to because you’re no longer married to him. 

Post # 64
Member
243 posts
Helper bee

TwilightRarity :  100% on board with all of this. I’m not even going to try to add in my own version of what you said, because you were so spot on.

OP: Listen to TwighlightRarity. She is consistently wise and gives some of the best advice I’ve seen on the bee or elsewhere. Take advantage of your numbness to help you get the tough tasks you need to get done completed before the pain hits you in full effect. Take this man to the cleaners. Best of luck to you, everyone is rooting for you.

Post # 64
Member
243 posts
Helper bee

Oh, no. I just saw your latest update. I had a sinking feeling that your mother might pull some bullshit like that, and you’re right — you’re better off just having friends if your family is a continuous disappointment (as it appears they are).

Post # 66
Member
345 posts
Helper bee

I’m just lost for words! You are an incredibly strong person to be dealing with this and remaining as level headed as you are. If you can make it through this, you can do anything! I wish you all the best! Hugs!!!

Post # 67
Member
9623 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

I’m sorry to hear your mother is taking that stance–but honestly not surprised.. I sort of expected it.

Definitely focus on taking his ass to the cleaners and ignore anyone (cough mom) who tells you to go easy on him in the divorce for the sake of your sister/the baby. 

Post # 68
Member
5224 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2017

worriedgal :  

Yeah, I wouldn’t be around your mom right now either. She can support them all she wants, this is just so disgusting.

Definitely look into counseling, I can’t even begin to comprehend this level of betrayal, and even your mom is betraying you.

Post # 69
Member
255 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: City, State

Be as selfish as they were. Your first priority is not your husband, your sister, the baby or your mom. Right now, it’s YOU.

Take care of yourself, bee.

Post # 70
Member
521 posts
Busy bee

OP, I’m honestly so shocked you turned out to be so level headed and calm and kind being raised with all this toxicity. You deserve so much better than what life has handed you thus far. I would also cut off your mother, at least for now. It’s all so disgusting and you deserve so much better. Distance will do you good. Take time to build a better support system, better friends that hopefully turn into a better family for you. I wish you well and I’m sure there’s so much happiness in store for you. 

Post # 71
Member
11807 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I’m so very sorry that on top of being betrayed by two people you should have been able to trust above all others that your mother is taking this delusional position. Sadly, your parents are between a rock and a hard place if they want a relationship with an innocent future grandchild, and to stand by you as well as support a daughter who sounds as if she may have serious mental issues, but the insensitivity and total tone deafness is absolutely deplorable. Your mother may be in total shock at this time too, but that doesn’t excuse her. 

Of course getting help for yourself is the very first priority. But I’d also seek family counseling with your parents before they more even harm is done to your relationship with them. They are going to eventually have to accept the fact that this has destroyed the family as it once was.

Post # 72
Member
6033 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2016

spendabuck85 :  Thank you!

OP- Your update just made me really sad and really really angry for you. Your mother is terrible, too. The very least she could do is have your back and tell your bitch sister off- pregnant or not, there are some behaviors that should not just be allowed to slide. She doesn’t have to choose to support one child or the other (which it seems that she’s doing). Her kids are adults, she should have figured out by now how to look out for both of you AND how to call out fuckery. SMDH. I’d cut ties with all of them- for the time being at least. They aren’t doing you any good and, in fact, are detrimental to your well being.

Post # 73
Member
255 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

TAKE HIM TO THE CLEANERRRRS!!! 

Post # 74
Member
1822 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Your husband and sister are the worst type of people. There’s a special place in hell reserved  for people like that.

Post # 75
Member
497 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

worriedgal :  you go girl. Honestly cutting them all off is the best thing you can do for yourself at this point.

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