Husband. Sister. Threesome?

posted 4 months ago in Intimacy
Post # 106
Member
803 posts
Busy bee

angelbritney :  “The better thing to do is to show the sister she can’t just take the husband away without a fight.”

No, the better thing to do is leave the two toxic psychopaths to their fantasyland and remove herself from their ability to involve her in their toxicity and betrayal. That man had two legs to walk away, two thumbs to type a sentence to shut down her sister’s idea, a tongue to tell his wife about her antics. Instead, he engaged in secretive, horrible sexual conversations that betrayed his wife. Those two had to go from talking, to talking about sex, to describing sexual desires, to proposing sex acts in order for the “threesome” conversation to take place. Cheaters, period.

What you are suggesting doing is telling OP to “fight” for someone who has shown himself to be worthless, and to continue to engage in some sick, childish, deeply disturbed competition her sister has invented in her head. Those things only perpetuate the dysfunction here and serve zero purpose.

This isn’t Simba and Scar; she isn’t going to throw her sister off a preverbal cliff into a pack of hyenas victoriously and take her place as the rightful heir of Pride Rock when she goes to “battle” for her husband.  He’s the elephant graveyard: he became devoid of all worth the second he chose to go down that path. No amount of hair pulling, peeing on him to mark her territory or lingerie is going to fix what is broken in that man.

The absolute worst thing OP could be doing is listening to her husband and sister proclaim “it was just a harmless joke,” or “oh, if you say you aren’t interested, we’ll simply drop it because we ‘love you.’” And beyond the worst of the worst would be to take your advice and engage in her sister’s mental health issues.

She needs a good attorney and a good therapist.

Post # 108
Member
5450 posts
Bee Keeper

angelbritney :  When someone hands you a flaming bag of shit you don’t fight to hold on to it. You fling it far and move on to better things. 

Post # 110
Member
131 posts
Blushing bee

angelbritney :  I don’t want to go on the band-wagon of attacking your views, but I want to address things that I disagree with.

-Men are not property. People are not property. They’re not something to fight over, take from etc. It’s all free will and he’s a man with a mind of his own. She shouldn’t have to “fight” for her husband. Let me tell you, I have a laundry list of exes that were dirty dogs who would pounce anything in a mini-skirt and not any one of them would try and do a three-way with my sister. That is beyond anything that an, on any level, “normal” person would do. That’s behavior that calls for therapy and serious, serious, serious solo reflection. Not her responsiblity, she needs to move the heck on. 

-You should never, ever, ever have it in your mind that men are something to compete over. Especially between sisters! And if one sister is making it a competition and constantly trying to “steal” her sisters partner, then that sibling relationship needs to be terminated. Period. Life is way too short for that. Blood or not. 

Post # 111
Member
919 posts
Busy bee

sboom :  haha you are probably right. I just like to try and offer an option for reconciling because I think too often the women want to stay with their guy. So I try to at least put something in a response outlining the kind of work that would have to happen to try and salvage it. This situation? Pretty awful

Post # 112
Member
340 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

angelbritney :  I like how you make it sound like men are incapable of withholding their desires.  Should the OP buy a leash for him too to make sure he doesn’t stray too far?  Better yet a cage too because the OP needs to make sure he doesn’t run off humping any girl that flirts with him?

It doesn’t take a man with iron will not to go after a flirtatious woman.  Most men are not horn dogs.  The thought of losing your soulmate/lifetime partner is scary to both men and women. If all your men happens to keep caving because other women shows interest in his penis then I feel sorry for you.  

OP – I think you need to step away from the situation.  Like many bees have said – your husband wants to screw your sister without risking or losing anything.  He’s trying to play up how he’s trying to make YOU safe and comfortable by wanting to have a threesome with someone you two already know. This is not about you.  This about him wanting to fuck your sister and knowing that his loving wife wouldn’t leave him.  Most people who are caught would immediately beg for forgiveness and is remorseful for their action.  But he’s doing neither because he has no respect for you.

As for your sister – as much as you love her you need to step away from her.  Clearly she has issues.  Until she can address it and fix herself she’s just going to keep becoming more and more toxic.

Post # 113
Member
2380 posts
Buzzing bee

If for a second you would consider doing this, don’t. It has catastrophe written all over it. 

If you must have a threesome have it with someone you wouldn’t ever have to see again. 

To be blunt, I think this is just a sign you should divorce your husband. This is really twisted for a guy to think about, his wife and his sister-in-law. Correction, not to think about, but actually consider doing. It is pretty sick for a girl to consider actually engaging with her sister and sister’s husband too.

I wouldn’t be able to look at him anymore.

Post # 114
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee

If OP wanted to leave her husband and give up on the marriage, she wouldn’t have made this thread, and nobody seems to be taking that into consideration.

Post # 115
Member
777 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

angelbritney :  All the other weird, f’d up shit you keep saying aside (serioulsy, are you 15?), if OP drops the husband AND the sister, which she most definitely should, then her freakshow of a sister will have zero opportunity to “steal” another man from her again. Problem solved.

Post # 116
Member
340 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

angelbritney :  if she wanted to leave her husband she would’ve jumped at the opportunity to leave him.  The reason why she’s not leaving is because IT IS difficult leaving people you love.  She created this thread to seek comfort and advice from strangers because she can’t get this IRL.  Just because you love someone doesn’t mean they are good for you.  Abused victims love their abusers but for their own sake, sanity, and happiness they have to leave so they can love themselves again.

Advising her to stay with her husband out of spite towards her sister is a horrible advice.  It will not help her rebuild her relationship with her husband (because clearly he sees nothing wrong with asking her to perform incest).  It will deteriorate her self-esteem. It will further destroy her trust with everyone around her.  So why should she lose herself just so she tell her sister she can’t have her husband?

Post # 117
Member
431 posts
Helper bee

Are you sure they haven’t slept together already? Do you have other family members you can talk to?

Him simply entertaining it is grounds for divorce. Her simply suggesting it is grounds for cutting ties with her. If you want a happy future, you need to keep them both out of your life. 

 

Post # 120
Member
349 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

deannamarie :  i literally was just gonna ask the same thing! 

OP I hope you come back to this thread,you have a ton of support here to help you get through this

Apart from angelbritney,do not take advice from her ffs!

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