(Closed) Husband turned out to be a serious and serial cheater

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 31
Member
533 posts
Busy bee

Get checked. Ask a lawyer for a preliminary counsult then let the lawyer tell you what you options are.   Take care of yourself.

Post # 32
Member
7643 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

glamgeek:  If at all possible, can you arrange that he takes the vacation without you? That gives you a week to pack up your stuff and move out (or move all his stuff to his mum’s). I can’t imagine vacationing with a man who was doing that to me.

Don’t send all the info to his friends. Again, take the high road.

Post # 33
Member
896 posts
Busy bee

Print all the evidence and stick it all over the walls in your home. When he comes home to see it all, have divorce papers ready for him to sign. Then just leave. 

Asshole. 

Post # 34
Member
257 posts
Helper bee

Don’t go to HR… Let him keep his job while you collect alimony. Check with a divorce lawyer, make him pay that bill too! I read about a case like this, you’re actually entitled to the money he spent on the websites and hotel rooms. Any money he spent to use to cheat on you, you can sue for and that’s your revenge! Good luck and I’m sorry you’re going thru this! 

 

Post # 36
Member
8 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’m sorry that you’re going through this.

i went though all the stages of grief when my past relationship ended in a similar way.  I say, take time to really think about what you want to do. That way,  you’re not caught up in the emotions and don’t do something you may later regret. I’m talking about the HR thing and telling friends /relatives- it’s easy to want to make him hurt as much as you are, but I think leaving in a dignified way is much more punishing. 

Try to surround yourself with people you love and trust during this challenging time.

Post # 37
Member
4858 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Move out, lawyer up and walk away. Don’t do anything that will impact you negatively like calling his HR for Revenge. Take him by the balls and make him pay. 

Post # 39
Member
215 posts
Helper bee

first of all, I am so sorry to hear this. What a creep. That sucks. 

Second, pack your bags and leave and start a new life. He sounds like a psychopath – faking emotions and having no remorse but also very organized in his cheating ways.

Third – this only makes me more certain on a pre-nupkin. its a napkin that my bf and I will both sign that says “cheater gets nothing”. I told him dont bother proposing unless you let me have my pre-nupkin. he agrees its a good idea. 

Post # 40
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee

I vote yes for you to tell the other wives.  AFTER the divorce is on its way and you two are separated… give them the hard evidence that you’ve printed/emailed to yourself.  They deserve to know.

So sorry – but the silver lining is you don’t have kids and YOU will find someone so much more deserving of your love and life.  Trust me.

Post # 42
Member
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Mandy0721:  +1000000. 

I would do the exact same.

Post # 43
Member
141 posts
Blushing bee

Living well is the best revenge. Get some counsel, find out what your options are and how to protect yourself. Get your health checked. Divorce as soon as possible. 

Just getting away from this man is its own reward. Consider this a ginormous bullet dodged. You could’ve been with him for a lifetime, had children, and never known what he really was.

Post # 44
Member
1407 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

glamgeek:  Terrible to find out someone is not who you think he is.

Keep quiet for now, go to a lawyer behind his back. Gather evidence. You will get through this.

See how you feel later about going to HR.

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