(Closed) husband wants sex during my lunch break!

posted 6 years ago in Married Life
Post # 16
910 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
leilarobs2:  no kidding right. 

I really don’t see why you need to rearrange your lunch and down time in your 9 hour day for a quickie. Why doesn’t he come home on his break? Better yet, if he can’t coordinate time alone with you to the point that he has needs lunch time quickies – he should look for a new job. You’re not his sexretary. 

Post # 17
1270 posts
Bumble bee

I agree with the people who are saying that maybe he needs to come home on his breaks if he wants the quickies. He is the one asking for it, not you, in fact it sounds like you could care less if you had sex more. I would say if he wants it more, he needs to put in more effort to get it. Maybe you could agree to do it once or twice a month for him, but you shouldn’t have to inconvenience yourself on a regular basis when you don’t feel appreciated/loved for it.

Post # 18
117 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

This sounds exactly like my fiancé Lol. We made a deal if he made a really good lunch for me I would come home for a quickie. So every couple weeks I would come home, we’d do it fast, then I would end up with a nice packed lunch I could eat in the way back. But tbh I didn’t mind the quickie so much lol 😉 I really milked the lunch thing too, but I’m pretty food motivated. Maybe something like that would make it worth it for you?

Post # 19
2539 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I think you are absolutely, 100% entitled to how you feel. So if it’s something you REALLY don’t wanna do, then of course you should express that to him.

However, that being said, I think lunch break sex is awesome! I think you just have to be in the right frame of mind. I’m not saying you’ve gotta go home for a nooner every day, but if every once in a while you plan it out ahead of time, it could actually be really exciting.

If you set a date in advance that you’re gonna come home on your break, you’ll be more likely to be thinking about it during the day… which can definitely help get you in the ‘mood.’ 😉

(Sorry, TMI!) Lunch break sex always made me feel totally ready to take on the afternoon afterwards. 😛

Post # 20
1542 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’d be furious! No one messes with my time to eat, not even DH. He knows better.

I agree with the PP’s who say that he should come home on his lunch breaks to have quickies, he’s the one who wants them.

But really, you should talk to him and tell him why you dont like lunch sex, and that it has nothing to do with it

Good luck!

Post # 21
515 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
Birchcanoe:  I love that you just described yourself as food motivated. 

Post # 22
563 posts
Busy bee

My friend meets her boyfriend for lunch sex like one or two days per week. They both work less than five minutes from her apartment and have an hour for lunch. I didn’t know this was so common. 

Post # 23
1754 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

This would irritate me too – I need quiet time during a work break to just breathe and not feel rushed or frantic!

And this would also make me feel cheap, so you are not alone there either, and shouldn’t feel bad. I like to do quick and dirty stuff sometimes, but even then I need cuddling and intimacy afterwards to not feel cheap or gross. Some people are just like that and he should respect your feelings there. 

Post # 24
2344 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I’d quite like this and it’s the kind of thing I’ve done in the past but you don’t so end of story.

Make sure he knows that you are chuffed that he fancies the pants off you and that you do fancy the rocks of him but that it’s just that lunchtime quickies aren’t for you.  

My OH likes morning sex, ughhhh! I just don’t get it, – give me tea and space.  Each to their own!

Post # 25
729 posts
Busy bee

I would feel the same way about the actual idea of lunch sex, but I’m not sure you communicated with him very effectively. Maybe he was just trying to be cute. From what you said, it sounds like you either flat-out rejected him or made excuses instead of telling him your actual thoughts until you snapped, so I definitely understand why he’s hurt. See what happens if you apologize for that, tell him you appreciate the gesture, but just explain that for you it’s a really stressful time. Maybe instead you guys could meet for lunch (note: I do mean actual lunch, as in food in a restaurant) somewhere closer to your office. That way you still get some time together in the middle of the day, but in a way that works for you too.

Post # 26
681 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

well here’s how I see it… He has needs that aren’t being met, that you are getting annoyed by. He is attracted to you and would rather be with you than take care of it himself. But this upsets you because he wants to do it when he sees there is time and you… Dont?

sorry but I think you may be being just a bit harsh on this one. You’re letting yourself got upset because your husband wants to have sex with you when he has the chance. Maybe your drive isn’t so high but my experience says to find a middle ground instead of you getting your way and your husband being left in the dust.

his needs are not being met in the relationship and this needs to be addressed (and not ignored) before more issues arise in your relationship

Post # 27
4697 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Car sex, in a mutually agreed upon, half way point is really the only solution here. 

Post # 28
2251 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I think its awesome that your DH has so much desire for you. Would you rather have a DH who does not want you? Appreciate the man once in awhile and do it, lets say on some fridays. The week is almost over, you can eat a sandwich on the way home. Nothing is wrong with this. He will love you even more for it. And you will be in good mood all afternoon, lol

Post # 29
7564 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

You’re entitled to like or dislike whatever you want.

many people find the “lunchtime quickie” to be exciting, passionate, maybe a little risqué and racy. For them, it’s equally about the thrill of it being the middle of the workday as it is about the physical sex, and if the thrill is important to your husband, perhaps together you can find some equally racy alternatives that don’t stress you out.

Post # 30
1037 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

What I take from this post is that weekends are not enough for your DH! He’s found a way where you can connect during the week and it doesn’t sound like his job has that option. Play up his fantasy once a week! lunches should be about forgetting work…can’t think of a better way to shut your brain off from a busy job!

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