(Closed) Husbands "ex girlfriend" going to my friend's wedding

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Should I go?
    Yes : (102 votes)
    98 %
    No : (2 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 3
    1361 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Sorry, but I really don’t see what the big deal is.  You can ignore her while you’re there.  It would really be a shame to miss your friend’s wedding because you’re uncomfortable about your husband’s ex who he hasn’t been with in 2 years.

    Post # 4
    399 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    It funny this post cause i just got married on 07/21/12 and i invited my oldest daughter’s dad and his gf to my wedding and everyone was in shock that i did that. First we dated like 12 yrs ago and we stayed friends all these yrs all because he has a great relationship with our child. Another thing a lot of our childhood friends were going and we wanted all to meet up. How did it go? It went great. We didnt even talk and I thanked his gf for being there. So I think you should go. He is your husband now not her’s and you are there for your friend not her. If you run into each other then be polite and act natural. It might be uncomfortable now but who knows once you are there its not as bad as you thought.

    Post # 5
    106 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Don’t let anyone else ruin your fun or your experience at your friend’s wedding!  You have the guy – you win 🙂  if there wasn’t any bad blood in the past, just be cordial.  Who knows, she might be really nice!

    Post # 6
    3771 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 1999

    You are married now, at this point the past is the past and I wouldn’t spend too much time stressing about it.


    Post # 7
    9982 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I would go and not let it bother me.  Look as fabulous as possible and feel confident and have a fun time.  She’s the ex, not you, lol.

    Post # 8
    4192 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

    If you do run into her, in the bathroom, for example, say “Hi (name), lovely wedding, isn’t it? I’m so happy for bride & groom.” No reason for her to bother you, unless she’s done things towards you, which you didn’t mention.

    Post # 9
    7295 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    to answer your questions: 

    What shouold I do?!

    You should go to the wedding

    What would you do?!

    I would go to the wedding.


    And like PPs have said, just ignore her and focus on having a good time.

    Post # 10
    2214 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I would go and not be bothered by it at all.  If anything, she will probably feel more awkward than you since your husband was with her 10 years and didn’t propose, but obviously knew you were the one and married you after a year.  Hopefully you can both go and just ignore each other and enjoy the wedding and support the bride and groom.

    Post # 11
    816 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013 - Mansion House at the MD Zoo

    I would go. There will be so many people there you’ll be fine. Also I think you’ll kick yourself later for missing something fun for a friend because of an ex. The more time passes, the longer she’ll have been an ex, so the sillier you’ll feel. Eventually, she’ll turn into just some friend of a friend who your husband dated a million years ago. And I am saying this as someone whose FI’s ex showed up to his grandmother’s -funeral- and acted like a fool.

    Post # 12
    2546 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I’d go. I don’t see the big deal really…

    Post # 13
    3885 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    I would go, and I wouldn’t even go out of my way to ignore the ex. If we ran into her, I’d be civil and polite. 

    There are ex’es everywhere. Everyone has a past. Life is too short to hide behind flowerpots till the coast is clear.

    Post # 15
    11231 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I know how you feel, OP. My FI’s ex got invited to one of his friend’s receptions. I only knew this because the couple did online RSVPs; she RSVP’d for 2 and ended up bringing a friend that no one knew (instead of her husband), which was really weird. The showed up 2 hours in, said hi to the bride (without introducing her friend), and then went to the other side of the room and sat in the corner and didn’t talk to anyone all night. I was honestly afraid that she was going to try to start something with myself or Fiance (she has before, so that wasn’t unfounded), but they stayed didn’t talk to anyone, get drinks, have a cupcake, or get up and dance at all. They did look quite a bit in my direction, but I was lookin’ pretty hot that night, so…

    Post # 16
    250 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    I’m sorry, OP, but what’s the issue?  As some of the PP’s have mentioned, it has been 2 years.  Look at it this way, if she shows up, she’s obviously not worried about running into you, so why should you worry about running into her?  

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