(Closed) Husband’s family members in delivery room?

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I thought I’d get away with not having to deal with this because in laws are a 4 hour flight away.  I went into labor 2 weeks early, and although Mother-In-Law was NOT there during delivery, I was still pretty annoyed that she changed her flight (which was not going to come in for another 16 days).  Her flight arrived just in time for her to come into the delivery room about 45 minutes after my son was born.  Although I have a decent relationship with her, it was annoying that we only had 45 minutes of “new family alone time” before she just barged in (without even asking if I was okay with it).  She was there while I was getting cleaned up and being moved from the bed to the wheel chair. I was NOT happy about her seeing me in that condition and was definitely not happy about the fact that she kinda just barged her way into such a private family moment.  yes, I realize she is family too, but I just really really wanted time to enjoy my new son before “sharing” him with others.  Might sound crazy, but that’s how I felt. Obviously I still harbor some resentment lol!  In retrospect, I should have made it more clear to Darling Husband that I did not want visitors right away!

Post # 4
Member
4803 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I don’t have a problem having everyone in the waiting room coming to see us as soon as we get cleaned up and bond for a few, but my Future Sister-In-Law did have her mom in the delivery room (she wanted me in there too – eek! but luckily I was out of town for a wedding when she went into labor), and whenever she talked about having more grandchildren she would not so subtly mention how nice it was being there for the birth. I nipped that in the bud and immediately said, “Well, just so you have advance warning, I won’t even want my mom in the delivery room! Just Darling Husband, everyone else can come in after I’m not so exposed and in extreme pain.” So when the time comes she can’t act surprised.

Post # 5
Member
5106 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Okole Maluna: I would have been pissed about that. Yikes.

I have a feeling my Mother-In-Law would LOVE to be in the room as soon as possible, but I plan to lay it all out there from the get-go. No peeps in the room besides me and Darling Husband during delivery, and we will let everyone know as soon as we are cleaned up and ready for visitors.

Post # 6
Member
493 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m expecting my first baby in April, and while I am planning on me & the hubs being solo during delivery, my inlaws did ask if they could come to an ultrasound. My Mother-In-Law works at my dr’s office though so I guess they felt more comfortable asking. They have not asked to be in the delivery room though! Could NOT handle the additional stress of that! The anticipation of awkwardness was the worst part about having them in on an ultrasound. It ended up being a nice moment to share with them and wasn’t nearly as weird as I had imagined it would be. I have amazing inlaws though.

Post # 8
Member
1510 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

HELL NO!!!  It will be Darling Husband and I only.  9 more weeks to go!

Post # 9
Member
5106 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Mrs. Louboutin: Oh my gosh! You’re soooo close! I bet you’re ready, huh?

Post # 11
Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My Mother-In-Law wouldn’t make it out of the delivery room alive. She gets on my nerves so bad hahaha… For her protection I would deny her entry to the room.

Post # 12
Member
3799 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Do hopsitals ask you beforehand when visitors can come in? I can’t imagine hospitals allowing anyone who wants to just barging into a room in the middle of a delivery. Isn’t that part of the birth plan (when and who can be in the room during that time)? Please excuse my dumb question, I’ve always wondered this and was sort of banking on being able to tell my doctor who I want there, in case someone tries to come in and they can’t? With all the releases and HIPPA stuff nowadays I’m surprised that people can just “come in”.

Post # 13
Member
554 posts
Busy bee

My in-laws stacked out the hospital when my SIL was delivering. They waited out there while she took over an hour to try to go to the bathroom after delivery. This is information I feel I shouldn’t know, but since they invaded, everyone knows the details now! This is my biggest anxiety as my due date approaches. I am hoping I deliver in the middle of the night, but I did use the experience to discuss with Darling Husband what will make me anxious and delay labor. SIL let everyone know as she started labor, I will not be doing this as Mother-In-Law suddenly felt awful and it became about her and her anxiety. I keep telling everyone the baby won’t expire and its still me doing the work so back off. I wish I lived further away and closer to my mom. 

Post # 14
Member
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I absolutely want Darling Husband and my mom in the delivery room.  Because I know my mom will be there, I’m willing to offer my Mother-In-Law to be there if she would like as well (although I don’t think she’ll want to be in the room for the delivery).

Post # 15
Member
94 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Helllll NO! That is an extremely personal and vulnerable experience that I do not wish to show to everyone. It will be Darling Husband and possibly my mom in the room during delivery. Darling Husband has said he will purely be a ‘shoulder coach’ b/c these things get him a little queasy lol. My mom is an ER nurse who worked for years in the NICU so I’d want her there just b/c she knows what is going on and has seen it a thousand times before. I’d rather her help me than some random nurse. But to each their own! A friend just delivered and was inviting anyone and everyone to come in and ‘see’…I passed lol.

Post # 16
Member
1506 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

There will be absolutely no one in the delivery room with me besides Darling Husband and my midwife or OB. I’d rather my husband not even be there to tell you the truth. He’s going to be fighting fainting/throwing up the whole time and will probably be no help at all!

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