(Closed) I am about to give up

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i so FEEL YOUR PAIN! I am so glad there is someone out there who is going through the same things as me. don;t give up. you love him and he loves you and even though i am as stressed as you are and i really want everything to be perfect and affordable in all reality none of it really matetrs. you will have him for teh reast of you life and he will have you. the decorations will go in the garbage, the guests will never remember the food and your dress will be tucked away in a dark closet.

if you read some of my posts i promise you will feel better.

and as far as friends go, I am not sure where mine went either 🙂 I think they are just tired of me complaining about the same things over and over.

i have kept a small budget this whole time and would def share some things i have done to cut costs if you like 🙂

Happy Wednesday!

Post # 4
Member
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

sorry for all the mispellings! had to type fast im at work shhhh!

Post # 5
Member
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Miss Otter,

 Planning big events can get really stressful, so it’s important to make sure you’re taking time to relax when you can! (Or make time if you have to!) Take baths, drink tea, eat cookies (or chocolate!) Try not to stress over something if it doesn’t go the way you wanted…just tell yourself, “okay, I’ll do something different then” Remember that just because you can’t find the exact right color for table cloths, or the DJ you wanted was too expensive, it’s not going to kill you. Literally. You’ll live and marry and be happy!!

 As for your fiance not seeming to be interested….women have a much stronger limbic system (which is the part of your brain that allows you to multitask). Men are actually built to only see the big picture, and to pay attention to what’s going on right now, and not think as much about the future. So it’s probably not that he’s uninterested, he’s just not naturally thinking of everything you are. Try to bring him in on some of those issues you’re worried about, like “flow.” If you focus his attention on it he probably will be interested and be able to help you. Just remember to only give him ONE thing to think about at a time!! And try to be as “calm and reasonable” as you can be when you do it….

As for the DJ, I don’t think $900 for 6 hours is out of the ball park, but if you can’t afford it, ask him about a shorter period of time, like 4 hours. You can use an IPod or MP3 Player, or even a cd player for during the “cocktail hour” or for the last couple hours of the party when no one’s paying attention to the DJ anymore anyway.

 As for your dress: STOP TRYING IT ON!! Especially if it isn’t altered yet! The wrinkles and length and everything else will be taken care of during alterations. The less you try it on, the less it will wrinkle, etc, and the more excited you will be to wear it on the big day! In fact, ask your mom or aunt or someone if you can store it at their house so you can’t even look at it!

I don’t have a lot of friends and I didn’t stay in touch with anyone I went to college with. Instead of having bridesmaids, maybe just have a bunch of flower girls. I’m having my brothers be my attendants instead of having friends that I don’t ever talk to. If they’re all infighting and being catty you don’t want to hang around them anyway.

Take a deep breath, eat something sweet, remind yourself that it’s not the end of the world (or even of your wedding), and remember that the reason you’re doing all of this is to celebrate the fact that you and your fiance are in love!!

Post # 6
Member
1501 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My wedding is in September as well and at the end of March I was starting to feel all sorts of pressure. Probably mostly from myself. I cried a bunch.

I’ve taken the last couple weeks off of wedding planning and now feel refreshed and ready to get back at it.

I took some time to relax as well as a couple of dates with Fiance.

Post # 7
Member
3520 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Calm down, take a breather, and maybe don’t actively plan your wedding for a couple of days.  Instead, when you find yourself worrying about something, write it on an index card and keep a stack going.  When you’re feeling relaxed, or ready to tackle the pile, address one issue at a time.  That way, you’re not worrying about everything all the time, but you are cataloging what you need to research.

I’m having trouble finding the perfect retro invitations–I think I’m going to go with a DIY kit from Michael’s and give it a retro feel with embellishments and the fonts.  If you get the 40% off one item coupon for Michael’s online, the kit for 50 invitations is just over $20.

Lastly, I think $900 is a bit much for a DJ.  If you call a country club or popular wedding venue, they will usually give you a list of reputable vendors that they use, even if you’re not using their location.

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