(Closed) I am devastated and so pissed at the jeweler

posted 4 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
4040 posts
Honey bee

ksn1219:  Let’s see: You can still be proposed to in Hawaii. You will still become engaged in Hawaii. You’ll just be getting the ring later. Hmmm…

I didn’t have a ring when my husband proposed. It was a surprise. We were poor college students. Weeks after we were engaged, my grandmother volunteered to gift us her engagement ring, since it didn’t fit her anymore.

It wasn’t custom made/ordered. The style probably wouldn’t have been my choice. And the center stone was about 1/4 of a carat. But did I care? No!

It represented the love my grandfather had for her and the love my husband (of now almost 37 years) had for me and it didn’t matter one bit that I received it weeks after his proposal.

Post # 3
1282 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

ksn1219:  Hmmm. I don’t know your SO but he seems to be really laid back about all of this. Is that the way he normally is? Maybe he is conspiring with the jeweler so that you will be surprised? 

If that’s not the case, that is incredibly frustrating that they have clearly missed their deadline and haven’t even started on the ring. Maybe he can propose with a placeholder ring, so you will still have the proposal in Hawaii. Or, he doesn’t necessarily HAVE to have a ring to propose. Take a deep breath and try and enjoy your vacation!

Post # 4
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard

Yeah, you can’t be depressed or upset. It is what it is right now. 

you have a great boyfriend who loves you, is customizing a RING for you, is going to hawaii with you on vacation, that you KNOW you are going to be engaged to shortly. 

It shouldn’t matter when and where, just to who.

I do get what you are saying, I think as women, we see all these love stories and movies and expect some grand gesture proposal and want the romance. Of course Hawaii, romantic, on vacation would be great. But reality is saying otherwise. 

Wedding planning is mostly something the woman does. The proposal is mostly the only thing that the man does and have control over. Don’t ruin it for him or by being depressed. Let him have this one thing..no matter when it is. 

When it does happen, no matter where, I hope that you will still be just as overwhelmed, excited and happy for his sake. 


Post # 5
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Does your boyfriend understand the sentiment behind Hawaii? Your partner can’t be a mind reader, so sometimes you have to ask for what you want. However, if you have expressed your hopes and desires, you do have a right to be upset over his unresponsive behavior. A placeholder rings sounds like the best alternative!

Post # 8
48 posts

ksn1219:  I feel your pain, our jeweller messed up BIG TIME and I’m still waiting for my ring 6 months later!!! I’d say still get engaged in the place you dreamt of! I still got proposed too, just with a picture of the design for the ring instead of the actual ring!! Don’t let silly jewellers ruin it for you 🙂

Post # 10
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I’d discuss getting a stand in ring for the proposal in Hawaii with your Fiance. Then you can have your actual ring whenever it’s ready 

Post # 11
34 posts


ksn1219:  We have just ordered my e-ring and are waiting for it to arrive. We have a few trips coming up, and I often find myself wondering if any of these trips will end in a proposal. I think you can drive yourself crazy sitting and wondering. I really want to enjoy my trips regardless of whether we become engaged or not. So I have made a conscious decision to just forget about it, it is really hard, but I want to enjoy my trips and not end up resenting my man at the end of each one lol. Just sit back and relax, sometimes surprises are nice. 🙂

Post # 12
5945 posts
Bee Keeper

My husband proposed to me 4 am in the morning with my engagement ring sitting in our dresser in its box. we were in our pajamas and should have been asleep but here he was proposing to me and it didn’t matter because what did matter was he said. And I’ll always remember that do whether he proposes with or without the ring remember it’s who you marrying and he sounds like a swell guy. 

Post # 14
48 posts

Fingers crossed for you!!

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