(Closed) I am done with our "best man"

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 4
1848 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Sounds like my FI’s little brother. Means well, but doesn’t have much common sense at all. I could imagine him pulling that crap on Fiance. Your Future Brother-In-Law doesn’t seem to mean well…he’s inconsistent and inconsiderate.

Fiance did not make younger Future Brother-In-Law best man for those exact reasons. He did have a stern talking to with him about BEING ON TIME and not PULLING BULLSHIT on our day. He looked offended at first but then promised he would not be trifling. Maybe he doesn’t want to talk to his brother because he’s afraid it would deeply offend him?

Maybe you two could contact the cousin more for those pressing details. I’m sorry this is happening to you…especially only a few months away from your big day. Weddings sometimes bring out the worst in people.


Post # 5
1420 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

That’s so annoying!  W sounds like such a gem.  I’m surprised you even want them involved at all, though, I’m sure it’s only because of A… I hope this doesn’t make your Fiance feel too badly. 


Fiance picked his brother for his Best Man too, and I think it was a horrible idea too (for different reasons).  But it still sucks, because whether it’s your problem or not, you still deal with the stress of the ramifications of their decisions/actions!

Post # 6
5956 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2018

What you cannot say to your Fiance…..

He will

Allow this portly fellow serve as a harbinger of your discontent, and after his awkward, sweaty jiggling to the sensual lyrics of Milkshake by Kellis….your Fiance will understand that however horrible what he just saw was, having his brother muck up the months leading up to your wedding is infinatley more ugly, and fix that immediately.

Post # 7
1109 posts
Bumble bee

@vorpalette:  I {hate} my FH’s best man. I can’t say it enough. We are far enough away from the wedding that we should drop him. He ruins every event with his new personality. Sometimes my FH pretends to ignore the douchetastic things bestman does… But I need him to man up and tell this idiot to get lost. 


I am sorry this guy is such a jerk… and I’m sorry this is his brother!! Family or not, your FH needs to say something. 

Post # 8
9139 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

When people ask whether I like being an only child, I just think of situations like this. for the record, it is NOT cruel to make your child an only child because your other child may turn out to be douchebags that everyone has to deal with.

Post # 10
1342 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

@vorpalette:  I feel for ya.  You just hang in there.  You’re right, you don’t really need any advice.  I hope the venting helped.  Trust me, I understand how you feel about FBIL!!

Post # 11
927 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Lmao @ “Oh my god, this is a horrifying wall of text. Sorry, Bees.”

Ugh that situation really sucks, I hope your FH talks to Future Brother-In-Law soon…I’d just tell him the whole thing is stressing you out and if he’s not going to take action to change the situation then don’t vent to you about it anymore : (

Another thread was talking about http://www.stfuparentsblog.com/ W sounds like she could end up on there lol

Post # 12
9947 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@vorpalette:  Wow, that sucks!  I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with this.  Hang in there!  Do you have another Best Man option?

Post # 13
3420 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

hang in there girl

Post # 14
4523 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@vorpalette:  That really sucks, they sound like a couple of jackasses.  I hope, for your sake, your Fiance comes to the decision on his own that he is over it and asks him to step down. That way, they cant turn it around on you.

Post # 15
360 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I don’t think this has anything to do with you being an only child. I have two older brothers, and I dont fuck around with them for one second, and that goes both ways. We are just blunt people who say what needs to be said. 

Are they abusing drugs? Seriously. They sound like low lifes. I know you said you didn’t want advice…(sorry) but basically fiance can handle it, or you can. Fiances choice. I’m sure he knows you well enough to know that you handling it would be a much different situation than the way he would handle it, and hopefully would make him do it himself! 

GOOD LUCK with those psychos. I hope their child makes it out alive. 

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