- 4 years ago
- Wedding: December 1969
Since the church does not recognize legal marriages I’m sure this is something you can do a Christian marriage. Now depending on your church their may be some requirements before you can (example in a Catholic Church you would have to go to confession etc..)
As long as your DH is on board you may wish to consult with a clergy person to find out how you should proceed.
I can’t think why anyone that really cares for you would criticize what you propose to do, but I also think that it isn’t a bit necessary to “explain” to anyone but your nearest /dearest what you plan to do either.
BLESSINGS, and hopes that you find joy and confidence in your decision making!
The backlash here is generally when a couple is legally married and later have a big wedding without disclosing that, and bees can see it as lying to their guests. This is different as you aren’t trying to pretend you’re not legally married and only your parents are involved anyway. I don’t have experience with it but if it will help you then go for it. I did go to a full catholic mass wedding recently that was 1.25 hours long and afterwards I thought, gosh, they’re thoroughly married now!😂
Thank you for your help so far Bees. I love all your thoughts with helping us to make a decision. Truly very encouraging replies and I really appreciate it!
I have been in contact with the church and there is a process involved which both of us are willing to do.
I really do hope it will help me ‘feel’ more married. I have been brought up with a religious background and so I feel that could be what was missing from our beautiful wedding. 🙂
I would love to hear if any other Bees have been in a similar position? Or if they felt one of their ceremonies was more ‘official’ than the other.
If something made their marriage ‘feel’ more official or real? 🙂
I personally knew prior to even getting engaged that having a Church wedding was important to me and as DH was indifferent/without faith then we got married in a Church.
How does your husband feel about having another ceremony?
Thank you for your thoughts. I didnt realise how important it was to me until after our ceremony.
Thankfully, my DH is extremely supportive of a second ceremony in the church. We are both supportive of each others beliefs.
Perhaps being married in the church will help me feel more married in my eyes, thats what I am hoping! 🙂
I totally understand the part about vows going by so quick is doesn’t feel “official.” DH and I eloped so the actual ceremony was very quick, probably five minutes total. It took me a while to feel “married” but that feeling comes in time! A moto I always say is: it’s the marriage that matters, not the wedding. However if you choose to still do a traditional ceremony you are not alone. I am going to three “weddings” this year for people who are already married. One was a couple who had a quick ceremony before the husband was deployed to Afghanistan and now want a tradition wedding and reception, another for a cousin who got married after finding out her cancer had returned but still kept her original wedding plans, and a third for people who had a private wedding and now want the big white wedding. People seem to judge no matter option you choose, so you just do you and be happy with whatever decision you make.
Thanks Lakeside003, perhaps that is all it is, I need to get used to it. Thank you for sharing how you felt after you were married! Thank you for your other examples too, they were very helpful. Double ceremonies seem to be increasingly popular. I have asked a couple of friends recently married and they said they didnt feel any different after. I expected everyone would feel different and especially more loved up etc after the ceremony, it would be a lovely feeling to have. 🙂
The topic ‘I am legally married and thinking of having a small christian ceremony’ is closed to new replies.