Post # 32
@phedre: I don’t believe anyone was insulting you or calling you fat in that thread. Like the poster above you said, the thread was created for women to bitch about our bodies, as we are prone to do. While it’s unfortunate that you have a medical condition that makes it difficult to lose weight, that doesn’t mean that no one is allowed to complain about how they look on any medium you might frequent. It also doesn’t mean posters aren’t being supportive.
Post # 33
@lezlers: I didn’t mean that anyone was being insulting just that it was upsetting to me. I’m sorry if it came off that way. Of course everyone is allowed to bitch about their body issues!
Post # 34
@phedre: That’s because no one on that post was really fat…they just feel fat. And I totally agree with everything you said. For me, I don’t feel fat, I AM fat lol so it does upset me sometimes when people who are underweight or average complain about their weight…makes me feel worse. I think everyone no matter what their size is, should be happy with themselves (even if not happy with weight). But, I do understand that ALL OF US get sad sometimes, totally normal. SO, I do agree with the OP that we need a reminder every once in a while, that we should look at more than just our body image to encourage ourselves and determine our happiness. 🙂
Post # 35
I want to reply to some of what I’m seeing said here (and really what prompted me to post what I did)…
I’m all for having a space to vent…I think venting is good, and healthy. What I find to be problematic and dangerous is when the posting turns into comparisons…oh I’m fat because I’m X height, or weight, or whatever, or I’m only this size. In my mind, not only does that not reinforce the fact that there are positive qualities about you for who you are, it also allows other people to potentially feel insecure and not measure up.
I guess part of the issue for me too is that we feel the need to put down ourselves due to issues of weight and height (whether or not they’re correlated with health). I think it’s unfortunate that women DO so often turn to criticisms about their bodies as a common form of venting, and I think that it’s sad that it is such an instant go to.
I think for me, what’s lying under all of this, is the hope that women can feel pretty and attractive and good about themselves, and not get so wrapped up in what the numbers mean unless they choose to, and it’s really positively impacting their physical and mental well-being. And unfortunately there are so many external sources that tell us to go in the opposite direction, and that just makes me sad.
Post # 36
I don’t think people were intending to not be supportive or to betlittle others’ bodies by having insecurities about their own. And I do agree that it can be cathartic to vent about what you don’t like about yourself and enlightening to see that others, of all sizes, share the same insecurities.
But there is something about the comparing heights and weights that can really get people down. As women I feel like we end up conditioned to think that weight and diet and exercise are so important and so integral to our self-worth. I also think men are being sold the same bill of goods more and more these days. Not that healthy habits are important, but that the hot, fit-looking body is.
Also, not everyone can do WW or count calories or go on a diet and have it be about self-respect and being healthy. Personally, I cannot. The day I start tracking exactly what I eat, is the day I start ignoring my hunger until I shake and sweat, eating food that makes me sick because I am following someone else’s guidelines and not my own body, and start hating myself again. [and I was never a full blown anorexic or severely underweight – I’m just a control freak who has different nutritional needs than what’s painted as ideal.] Fortunately for my sanity, I don’t look like I need to lose weight to be healthy, so I don’t get a lot of cognitive dissonance. It actually took awhile into my recovering from that mindset to realize that there are people out there who can lose weight in a healthy manner.