Post # 1
My wedding is going to be intimate, family, two sets of friends from each side and limited. i had my uncle’s wife ask me, right in front of her sister, that I met like once before, if she’s invited to the wedding. More like, “My sister can come to your wedding, right?”…. um…No. Then she was asking my mom if her sister can go. Ugh! I’m already to my max of guest, even if I wanted to, I can’t invite no more people. But I don’t want to invite her anyway. I made it clear to my parents no extended family or people I don’t know.
How did you handle people inviting themselves or others?
Post # 3
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@echolove: In the early stages before we had anything planned I laughed it off or if it was online I ignored it.
Later down the line I just said we had space and budget restraints, for you you can say that it is going to be very intimate.
Then the next time that uncles wife is having a big invite tell her your bringing your friend’s, brother’s cousin and inviting yourself to point out how rude that is…. 😉
Post # 4
@echolove: How incredibly rude to put you on the spot like that! Just practice saying, “Oh, I’m so sorry but we’re having a very small wedding and we can’t invite everyone we’d like. “
If they persist? “I’m sorry, but no.”
Post # 5
@echolove: I’m dealing with this now too, and it is soooooooooo annoying and adds more stress that I would rather not have. I’m getting married tomorrow and have had an influx of this. Why can’t people just be happy for you, and keep it moving!
Post # 6
@jcaldwell85: Congrats! So excited for you. Tomorrow is the big day. If they’re not invited the day before the wedding, they should know by now. Lol
Post # 7
@jcaldwell85: Happy wedding day! May it be joyful!!
Post # 8
@echolove: The rudeness was on your aunt’s part, not you. The fact that she went behind your back to ask your mother is appalling.
@Zhabeego had the best answer. Repeat it ad naeasum hahaha
Post # 9
@echolove: I JUST had this happen to me this past weekend. We are also having an intimate wedding of only 10 people. I thought my family understood the reasoning behind this decision but I was apparently wrong. I had my Aunts,and a cousin basically try to invite themselves to it. And snarky comments to boost. I just had to say I’m sorry, but I want you to know I would have loved to have you their, but with my fi’s family being from out of town and no one really able to attend we had to make it a short list of immediate family only. I did get a snarky comment from my cousin. He said so we aren’t invited to this? I said No i’m sorry. He looked at my Fiance and said Well good luck with that! In this nasty tone. I wanted to be like…THAT’s why you are invited right there, but I didn’t. I just had to smirk and water off a duck it.
Post # 10
@echolove: Thank you very much!! 🙂
@LuvMySailor: Thank you!
Post # 11
This has been happening to me quite a bit…I sent out our Save the Dates and a month or two later I started getting family members crawling out of the woodwork asking me if they were invited. These are people I haven’t spoken to in YEARS. Because they don’t know my phone number, this was always via Facebook…which for some reason offended me more. I chose to ignore those people.
The icing on the cake was my cousin (who is getting married a month before me) sent me a VERY angry FB message about not being invited to my wedding…I’m still stuffing the envelopes for the invites mind you. Best part? I was never invited to her wedding and I haven’t talked to or have even seen her in over 3 years…I brought this up and about 2 weeks later I received an invitation…about a month after everyone else received theirs.
I never really believed it when some of my married friends told me “you’ll start to see people’s true colors when you’re planning a wedding.” NO KIDDING.
If someone isn’t invited that you really care for, but you just can’t afford it, explain that to them. They WILL understand because I am sure they care for you just as much!
For the people who just want in invite for the sake of getting an invite? Be kind to them and say it’s a small intimate wedding. Who will argue with you over that? Just remember to be kind…and if they don’t like your answer than too bad. They aren’t paying for it all 🙂