(Closed) I am really confused. Could use some advice, and a hug.

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
699 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

If both family and Fiance say you can do both, why are you so worried about the etiquette?

Post # 4
Member
3720 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m sorry! I would say to get the three month suply, job hunt, and go from there. If you have no leads in 3 months, reconsider.

Post # 5
Member
5479 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Kudos to you for not settling or caving to others’ demands.  That must be tough.  Is there any way that you can qualify for public assistance/medicaid/unemployment to hold you over until you can find another job?  You have been working and paying into a system that is SUPPOSED to be there for you when you need it- that’s why it exists- so you should take advantage of it. 

Post # 6
Member
1186 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think you should wait for your wedding.  For the first time in my adult life, last year I was uninsured due to job loss and it ended up being OK.  It is a good idea to stock up on medication, get a written Rx for refills and price compare different pharmacies if you have to pay cash in the future.  If you are eligible for COBRA, you can wait and see if you really need it.  I think you get 3 months where you can apply for it retroactively in a true emergency (think hospitalization).

Post # 7
Member
901 posts
Busy bee

I can understand how you feel, but I also understand the practicality of getting married legally for now to avoid becoming uninsured. If you have serious health issues, it’s a terrible idea to let your insurance lapse. I have friends that did something similar and still had the wedding a year after. She has a degenerative disease and had just lost her job, too. The wedding was lovely and I don’t think it took away from the moment at all.

Even if you find a job tomorrow, it’s not likely you’ll be insured right away. I say go to the courthouse and give yourself two wedding anniversaries πŸ˜‰

 

Post # 8
Member
3572 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

does your Fiance have health insurance that allows him to add a domestic partner?

Post # 9
Member
1279 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Have your wedding. πŸ™‚ Life is full of ups and downs. If you and your Fiance are strong and believe in one another, you both will make it through anything.

Post # 10
Member
433 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@scarlet_letter:  

 

What wedding etiquette? Can you explain that part….I don’t see a problem here at all. Going to the courthouse and doing a civil ceremony is akin to a trip to the dmv, it’s an errand…a technicality in my book. We’re going and doing one next tuesday in preparation for our big destination wedding in november because we want to be legally married in the state of california and our wedding is in mexico.   I don’t feel cheated or weird in any way by the fact that we’re legal on tuesday but I’m putting the dress on November 3rd.

I just view it as something I have to take care of, and then on the big day, that is what I consider to be my “wedding.” I think you should take care of the legalities in order to preserve your insurance, and then plan for your actual ceremony later down the line.

 

Post # 12
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I vote to wait for the wedding if you really want to. My Mother-In-Law suggested we get married early for health insurance purposes, but I didn’t want to bc I didn’t think we would have a wedding if I did that. I’m glad we waited, but we were lucky enough to stay healthy during the year we waited.

Post # 13
Member
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I may be totally against “tradition” but I’m fine with that.  πŸ™‚  If getting married gets you the proper health insurance that you need, why the heck not?  And if you want to have a wedding in a year, why the heck not?

I know people get all up in arms about having a “wedding” after a courthouse/eloping ceremony.  But the people who really love and care about you don’t give a damn.  They will want to celebrate with you in whatever ways you think are best.  

Side note: you don’t need to be a member of Costco to get Rx there.  It’s one of the cheaper places to go.  Also, Walmart and Target offer fantastic generic Rx prices.  Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
11234 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Oh lord.

Go get married at the courthouse. Don’t tell anyone. Problem solved.

Post # 15
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@scarlet_letter:  “I have a govt job and some supervisors are leading me to believe that I will not qualify for unemployment. (Because I knew my contract was ending.. Umm… that’s not entirely accurate but it’s what they’re saying!!) But I will be trying to file for it nonetheless. Thanks.”

Just because it was a contract job doesn’t mean squat.  If you’re laid off because of lack of work, that qualifies.  I did the same thing in 2003 because I was a temp.  Technically, my last contract ended.  I took two weeks and then applied for unemployment. My husband was also a contract worker (in the mortgage undustry – ouch) and he qualified for unemployment.  You’re fine.

The topic ‘I am really confused. Could use some advice, and a hug.’ is closed to new replies.

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