(Closed) I am very upset with my BMs

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

That’s very very annoying. My BM’s went to try on dresses and upon making a suggestion then said they didn’t have the money to pay for them right now. I was like um what??? Then the dress designer came back and said they had discontinued them! It ended up working out and it was a total mess.

Post # 4
186 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

i’m so sorry you are going throught this … i read your previous post so it’s the second time that it’s post point… can’t they lend the money from their parents or anyone?

Post # 5
489 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Are they short dresses?  Can you look into non-bridesmaid dresses?  Like regular department stores.  Its annoying that they didn’t tell you sooner, but it is awkward to tell someone that you can’t afford something.

Post # 6
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

maybe they both had something come up that was a money suck? my fi and i are living off my salary since he’s in school, and i know that even if i tried to save up money 2 months ago it would have had to go somewhere else (like the oil change i just got for $85 after finding out that vw recommends only synthetic oil…so annoying)

Post # 9
3364 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

That ha got to be frustrating! Is there any way you could get a loan from someone? I hate to even suggest that, but are you on quite the time crunch?! And depending where you go, dont you only have to put a deposit down?! And pay in full upon pick up?! I am not sure, but maybe you can talk to them! Or open a line of credit up?!

I cant even begin to imagine your frustrations I hope you all can find something that works for the situation!

OH a great back up, since you only have 2 girls, maybe you can go to Nordstroms or Macy’s or the Nordstroms Rack or anywhere with dresses and find something for them!!! And you just might score a great deal!

Post # 10
206 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

Yeah, I would just go the department store route and find some great-priced short dresses. Nordstroms etc. usually has WAY nicer dresses than the typical Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses at bridal salons anyway. Since it’s right before Christmas, I’m sure they don’t have a lot of extra cash (even if they were told in advance). You have 5 whole months to get the dresses, so I wouldn’t worry about them needing to get everything in December already.

Post # 11
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I basically ordered a dress from a catalogue company (even with horrible interest rates lol), to see if they liked it, cos I thought it was perfect. They loved it – all four of them – so I ordered three more. The dresses cost 119 euro each – I think ca $150? including shipping, so obv will cost me a bit more with interest, but I’m paying them off at a tenner a week so it’s no real strain.

Over here the bride pays for the bm dresses. And their hair and make up. And usually jewellery too. Bah!!


Post # 12
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

That sucks but I agree with Kitzy, we just had a similar issue, I had a nice chunk of money saved for wedding stuff and it all had to go to some unexpected bills 🙁

Post # 13
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

The Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses I wanted were on sale this weekend, so I told the girls if they had the money to go ahead and pay the deposit on them to please call the salon before 3pm on sunday and anyone who didn’t, I would pay the remaining deposits after 3pm.  I knew some of my girls felt like paying for the dress right before Christmas was a bad idea, so I covered the ones that didn’t feel comfortable.

I understand if you don’t have the money to help them out for now, but you should try to understand that it is right before Christmas and it may be hard for them to get the dress and pay for presents right now.

Regardless, I’m sure getting the dresses in Jan will work out fine. I’ve never had a Bridesmaid or Best Man dress take more than 3 months to come in.

Post # 14
660 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Not to scare you, but I’ve had a pretty bad experience so far with Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses. We ordered the dresses 5 months before the wedding and although they didn’t tell me initially they dresses had to be RUSH ordered to arrive on time for my Feb. 2011 wedding. Without rushing, they were scheduled to arrive the week of the wedding. So either go to the dept. stores or get orders in quick just to be safe.

Post # 15
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Sometimes things happen.  It’s really expensive to be a bridesmaid and I’m sure it doesn’t feel awesome to not have money.  I’d say cut your bm’s some slack and try to pick something they can afford.  My bff had us buy dresses from Target and it turned out fine.

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