Post # 1
I’m sorry, I just have to address this. After a million posts I am just tired of biting my tongue, so forgive me.
Ageism, or age discrimination is stereotyping and discriminating against individuals or groups because of their age. It is a set of beliefs, attitudes, norms, and values used to justify age based prejudice, discrimination, and subordination.
I’m REALLY tired of that [that being the title] being said on posts where the bride is going a bit ‘zilla. Young or not, it has zero to do with it. There are plenty of bridezilla-ish things said by brides of ALL ages. It isn’t as if someone can say “Oh, I can tell that you’re old,” when someone gets a mightier-than-thou attitude.
Age has nothing to do with how someone chooses to carry him or herself; it really doesn’t after a certain age. We’re all adults. I’m under the impression that many posters here quite like and respect me, and if I’m not mistaken, it has nothing to do with the year on my birth certificate.
I’m grumpy at being lumped in with people who are selfish, bratty and spoiled all because I haven’t reached the age of 26 or whatever the “acceptable” age is. This isn’t meant to say that young brides don’t have issues, but it IS meant to point out that ageism isn’t any nicer than racism, sexism, etc. So please stop. Respond based on the individual poster and call it a day.
Please and thank you. 🙂
Post # 4
I wholeheartedly agree with this post. If anyone ever called an older encore bride on the fact that just because she got divorced does not mean she has all the answers (if any), the boards would be in an uproar. Individual posters shouldn’t be judged by their age but by the content they are contributing to the site.
Post # 5
I don’t think of people here on the boards as young. I think of them as immature no matter the age. I work with a 62 year old immature woman…immaturity knows no age. 🙂
Post # 6
Great post OP, I 100% agree.
Post # 7
I admit I am wrong for assuming people are young. When threads are made with poor grammar and punctuation I always assume the poster is 18. Or if it’s full of drama and scandal.
I’m 33 and guilty of drama and scandal, so I suppose I shouldn’t throw stones.
For what it’s worth, OP, I always find your posts insightful and mature.
Now back to my Maury show.
Post # 8
I try to only bring age into it when age clearly is an issue… like it’s a very young couple and living a bit more seems to be the only logical solution etc.
Point taken, though… immaturity knows no age lol.
Post # 9
I feel similar. It grinds my gears to no end. I’ve had a co-worker go on and on about people my age aren’t mature enough to make big decisions and shouldn’t marry. FI and I met at 21, engaged when I was 22, and will be married in 39 days when I’m 24 (FI will be 29, but I digress). I am probably one of the most mature people could possibly meet. It has nothing to do with my age, but with life experiences. I’m sure members on here or in real life don’t like me because of my age and maturity, but because of the person that I am. =)
Post # 10
I’ve only been on this site for a few weeks now, but I’ve never read a post and thought “oh, they must be young” or “oh, they must be old”. I love that this site protects your anonymity, and therefore, doesn’t give your age away. All that matters is what we’re sharing with one another regardless of age. Waiting brides, future brides, and past brides all come together to share their thoughts and experiences. Why should it matter how old someone is?
Post # 14
@madteaparty: Good, I’m glad you aren’t doing that. 🙂 Some posters, however, do. It doesn’t happen “all the time” by any means, but I’ve been around for almost 2 years and have definitely seen my fair share whether it’s on purpose or not. The problem is that they almost always mean it in a bad way. I think we’re all aware that a 40 year old person has more life experience than a 20 year old person (based purely on time) but that doesn’t mean that the younger person has had no valuable life experience whatsoever or deserves to be spoken/responded to like they are 12. You’re exactly right that it shouldn’t matter. 🙂 P.S. I really like your username.
And I like you very much! 🙂
You’re right, but there are gentler ways to say “take a step back” or “live a little” than “you are clearly too young to marry.” < — I’m not saying you would say it like that, only making the point that tact goes a long way. 🙂
I think certain things in posts do give off the vibe that perhaps there is a lack of understanding the world, people, relationships, etc. But you’re right on that immaturity has no age and is not to be applied to a number. I think my 8 year old sister is significantly more mature than a lot of people I know in their 20s, 30s, 40s. Haha.
To everyone else – it just had to be said for my sanity.
Post # 15
@OctBride-2012: Immaturity is the best word to use, I think. Unfortunately lots of people (in general) associate “immature” with “young” which…is part of the problem.
Post # 16
I could totally tell how old you are just by reading this post….