(Closed) I can't believe I am typing this out.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 137
672 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@danisalci13:  He is insulting you and belittling you in front of others. He has no respect for you and thinks he can treat you however he wants. You didn’t make him this way, he’s just a POS and you deserve better. If you marry him it will continue – and possibly escalate as abuse often does.

By The Way, my Fiance has never called me any mean names or cussed me out. I actually heard my neighbour call his girlfriend a “f-ing b*tch” the other night followed by screaming, crying, and lots of banging noises – I called 911 because he’s obviously abusing her. It’s not a far step from name calling to physical abuse.

Please take care of yourself and call off this wedding. He will probably cry and apologize and say all kinds of nice things to you when you do it, trying to gain control over you again, but do not fall for it – he’s an abuser and he’s not genuine in his kindness.

Another thought – what if you get married and have children? Men who abuse their wives often aren’t afraid to abuse their children also. I know you don’t want to be married to a man like that.

Post # 138
1374 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Pavilion overlooking golf course scenery, reception at banquet hall

@SummerOfLove:  She has already left him.


Good on you, OP. He’s a shitstain. The best advice I’ve ever been given about a breakup is to sever ALL contact. Every single bit. If he has one of your possessions that you want, have a friend or family member get it, but do not talk to him again. It is the easiest way to move on, and has the least chance of you (general “you”) running back to him.

Post # 139
1878 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014


I am so proud of you!!!

Just remember you are an AMAZING woman who deserves so much more than what he was dragging you through – you deserve someone who insists on BRAGGING about you in front of friends, who always compliments you, who LOVES YOU for WHO YOU ARE!

We’re always here if you need us!

Post # 140
644 posts
Busy bee

@danisalci13:  Good for you! You 100% made the right decision. Hope you made your plane 🙂

Post # 141
1846 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@danisalci13:  DO NOT GO THROUGH WITH YOUR WEDDING.  The consequences of a divorce are drastically greater…

I’m going to PM you a story. 

Post # 142
13920 posts
Honey Beekeeper

@danisalci13:  You did a tough thing and you deserve all the credit in the world. One day you will look back and be grateful that you had the courage, the strength, and the decisiveness to make a new and better life for yourself. Take all the time you need and let others help support you through this. You did it, now just take it one day at a time. HUGS. 

I agree with aggie2010 and would add, if possible change your locks, change your number, block social media and don’t be tempted to talk on the phone, text or meet for  any “closure” with the ex.  A clean break is usually best.

Post # 143
952 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

You did the right thing!  Hugs and prayers- you will get through this!

Post # 143
4560 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010


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danisalci13:  Thinking about you and hope you are doing well!

Post # 144
10223 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Sit down & make a list of every mean/hurtful thing he’s said or done to you.

Just do that, it’s all I ask of you.

Post # 145
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013


Honey, run. It is not drastic to back out of a relationship with a man who is cruel to you. It will be far worse if you have to try and divorce someone with a cruel streak. At least put it on hold and go to counseling. His behavior is mean and abusive and I think you know that. Don’t get trapped because you’ve spent money on vendors. It’ll be okay. It’s more important that you are happy, healthy, and safe.

Post # 146
4134 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

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antisocialite:  she already left him, this thread is 3 months old

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