Post # 1
Hi Bees! Hope everyone had a great week!
I recently subscribed to the site, altho I always come to the site to get ideas.
Anyhow, I am planning a summer wedding. I have been engaged for a little over a year, we decided to have a long engagement so that we can save as much $$$ as possible we have a large family so we are having a 300+ guests at our wedding. So I come from a family of 4 I am one of the youngest. My oldest sister got engaged in July and we were all very happy an excited for her until…………..She decided to plan her wedding in May of 2012 a little less than a month before me! Ahhh at first I wasnt too upset about it until recently she asked my mother if her and I can have a bridal shower and Bach. party together! Um excuse me but no I dont want no combined showers together. Ahhh im freaking out! I dont know what to do with myself! I am no longer excited to plan my wedding im just too upset about it! Can I get some advice please! Ahhhhh
Post # 3
If it were me I’d push my wedding back to the end of August. You’re going to have a lot of the same guests and people that have to travel any length of time aren’t going to want to come again a few weeks later.
Post # 4
just tell your mom you don’t want a combined shower?
Post # 5
Thats what we were thinking mid July even?
I did and my moms response was……..Well that would save us some $$$$. I dont care if I have to end up paying for it anymore 🙁
Why did it have to be complicated?
Post # 6
@mp123: This may sound underhanded but you may have to go on the offensive. Keep your wedding ideas to yourself. Get your Save the Dates out first. Have someone else plan your shower, like your Maid/Matron of Honor or bridesmaids, and have your invites out first.
If you do not want to move your wedding, don’t. I hope this does not become a competition. You deserve your own shower and bach party. Every bride does
Post # 7
Why not just be happy for your older sister? I am sure she was thrilled about your wedding and she seems to want to share her joy with you by combining events. I say, get past the feelings you’re having and feel lucky that things are going so well for yourself and your family!
Post # 8
I would be annoyed as well.
Post # 9
I feel for you, that is really rough. If you are comfortable moving your wedding to august, I think thats smart, less stress is always a good idea and it will probably make your relatives happy. Also, you can theoretically have your bachelorette and shower after her wedding.
I think it should be pretty easy to explain that you want separate bachelor parties, it might be weird to hang out with people each other doesn’t know for such an intimate event. The shower might be more challanging to be tactful about, but I’m sure if you are firm they will understand. I agree with LuvMySailor — have someone else plan it if its going to be an issue. Would you not also be inviting your close friends and his female family to your shower? I could only imagine it getting confusing for people if they were combined like that.
Post # 10
Totally disagree. Why should OP have to sacrifice what she wants for her own wedding events?
Post # 11
I would just move your wedding and say that someone else is having the bridal shower/bachelor party??? I’m not sure how your family would save money from this, because they should be getting each of you a present anyway. Are you each other’s MOH? And how on earth would you guys have a bachelor party together?? Are you fiancé’s in the same friend group?
It really doesn’t make sense….just move your wedding and let your sister have her moment so you can have yours all to yourself. The other stuff is just…weird.
Post # 12
I would be livid! Those dates are way too close. Your wedding is going to be over shadowed by hers! If I were you, being the bitch I can be, I would move my wedding date one month EARLIER than hers!
Post # 13
Ooohhhh, I would be SO MAD!
Post # 14
That’s horrible! Two weddings in one family in one year is tough, let alone a month apart. I would be hurt as well. I don’t know how close you two are, but maybe you can talk to her about this?
Post # 15
@Carolyn72: The evil in me says “LIKE” 🙂