Post # 1
So I went to my doctor (gyno) about a month ago. I was so excited because my fiance’ and I decided that it would be okay for me to stop taking my BC pills after our wedding. He told me to talk to my doctor about TTC and get more information on it. I was super excited and happy that he was on board because I would like to start TTC about 6 months after our wedding. Well, I told my doctor everything and her first response was “how old are you?” I told her I would be 28 two months after my wedding. Then she goes on to say ” Well, I don’t know what your rush is. I didn’t have a baby until I was over 30. You need to enjoy being married and sleeping in on the weekend and not trying to get pregnant.” I was totally appauled. I guess she saw it in my face because after that she said “I guess you didn’t ask me for my opinion.” I was like no I didn’t. One top of that she didn’t even bother answering my questions or giving me any information on TTC. I really don’t know what to do now. She is a good doctor but I am really thinking about switching to someone else who is less judgmental and more understanding. Advice ladies please!!
Post # 3
@Charlies_Angel: Get a new, non-judgmental gyno.
Post # 4
@Charlies_Angel: Wow- what a judgemental bitch.
Post # 5
Yeah that was not okay. She is there to support you and guide you regardless of how she feels about your choices. What is right for her is not right for another person. I would look else where.
Post # 6
@Charlies_Angel: It was probably just a moment of diahrea mouth or thinking out loud. I’d let it slide. She’s going to do her job no matter what and its hard to find a good doctor.
Post # 7
@Charlies_Angel: meh i always think you should wait at least a year before ttc after marriage (unless youre older). She was just being conversational and giving advice. I doubt she meant it as anything more than sharing her opinion
Post # 8
I don’t view that as judgemental or bitchy at all. She was merely giving an opinion….and really, I think she has a really valid point.
I think the only reason to be hurt or miffed would be if she had prefaced it with…”You’d be foolish or stupid to have a baby at your age…..” which she did not.
Post # 9
How rude! Even if she disagrees, that’s NOT her place.
Post # 10
Maybe she just trys to be personal with her patients but I think its totally rude. Its non of her business.
Post # 11
Get a new gyno..sooo RUDE!! everyone has a different time frame on having kids..she shouldnt give her opinion if you didnt ask for one!! What a Bitch..
Post # 12
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Did she give you proper medical advice after that? I would give her a chance at one more appointment, especially if I liked her and her practice up to that comment. Maybe she had a particularly rough night with her own child and forgot to keep her opinions to herself. Everybody has an opinion about marriage and TTC and babies and I promise you that you will hear it all from everyone, even advice that is blantantly wrong or against your beliefs.
Edit: Re-read it and saw this “ One top of that she didn’t even bother answering my questions or giving me any information on TTC.” I would change ob/gyns if my doctor refused to answer my questions or provide me with proper medical advice regarding TTC. At the very least she should have counseled you on folic acid, ovulation (and basic conception to make sure you know how to make a baby; you would be surprised), and a general idea of how long it takes a healthy couple to get pregnant (one year.)
Post # 13
That’s my point ladies. I understand that she may have been just trying to pass her opinion and that’s fine. But atleast give me the information that I am seeking. I thought that was rude. It was almost like she was making the decision for me.
Post # 14
i hear that same spiel from everyone – including my therapist! I just learn to ignore them. When you’re prego you;ll be getting a lot of unsolicited advice, might as well get used to it now! Don’t get me wrong, I would definitely be annoyed she said it (as I am anyone that does – dr or not) but, if you like her as a doctor I would just let it roll off your back and keep her. She apologized.
Post # 15
I actually agree with her. She also won’t be the last person who tells you that.
Post # 16
@beachbride1216: Agreed. OP, I think you should give her another chance. Doctors are humans. Sometimes, they have off days.