(Closed) I can’t keep quiet anymore, it hurts too much

posted 9 years ago in Waiting
Post # 17
Member
1643 posts
Bumble bee

OP–if he isn’t the type to lead you on, then why is he leading you on? If you’re so desperate to get married that you’re spilling your every thought to strangers on the internet, then I highly doubt that you’ve never made a peep about it in real life.

It’s clearly killing you, and for him to be in a relationship with you, and SEE that, and not so much as MENTION any kind of a future together…tells me that he just doesn’t see one. I’m sorry. But this guy sounds like he’s not that interested.

Post # 18
Member
1643 posts
Bumble bee

@Shirinjoon: She isn’t judging you for waiting. She’s not judging you at all. She’s just asking you how many times you have to type things out before you realize what you’re saying means!

 

ETA: Just scanned through the threads you’ve started. You’ve written SEVERAL that are miserable in tone. How many times do you have to say that you’re unhappy to realize that you’re really not happy with him??

Post # 20
Member
1643 posts
Bumble bee

Then go TALK to him instead of crying on the internet!

Post # 22
Member
9816 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

@Shirinjoon: No, actually I just find it baffling when people do the same thing over and over expecting a different answer.

ETA: Obviously you’d rather flounce outta here than listen to common sense. Seeya!

Post # 23
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think that everyone needs to be a little more supportive here.  If you don’t like reading about the frustrations of waiting, then you shouldn’t be on the waiting board because you obviously can’t relate.  I am not trying to be mean, but I think it is rough for the girls who are already sad and frustrated to have other bees rip them apart for sharing their feelings (no matter how many times they feel the need to).  This is what this board is for.

Now…OP, I am sorry that you are hurting so much.  I went through this with my ex and it really is one of the hardest things I ever went through.  It didn’t end up working for us (obviously) but I hope that your situation has a better outcome! I waited for 6 1/2 years for my ex to propose and finally I got to the point where I realized it just wasn’t going to happen.  We had the same problem about never discussing the future unless I brought it up, and even then the conversations were one-sided (I realize looking back).  I agree with a lot of other posts here that you need to have an honest conversation with your SO about where he sees your relationship going.  Try to stay as calm as possible (I know it’s hard), and just listen to what he has to say.  You can even tell him that you are worried because he never talks about a future together.

Good luck! I really hope it works out for you!

Post # 24
Member
1643 posts
Bumble bee

@Shirinjoon: Excuse me…? I was trying to give you advice that you asked for and clearly need. You really do need to go talk to him. You wanna talk so bad but have you even tried? And quite frankly, if he still refuses to talk about it even then…you have your answer. Rule #1 on the internet-don’t ask for honest advice and then get pissy when you get it.

Post # 25
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Remember OP every bride to be has once been a waiting bee. You just need to keep trusting in each and make sure he clearly understands what you want.. if you waiver, he’ll waiver..

 

good luck.

Post # 26
Member
511 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

oh wait, i just read you’re leaving bee (confused?).

Tese ladies had great advice, and as a once waiting now engaged bee, i’d listen. Really, it’s to your benefit doll, no one here is trying to be malicious.

 

Again, good luck.

The topic ‘I can’t keep quiet anymore, it hurts too much’ is closed to new replies.

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