(Closed) I can't sleep..Someone please give me some advice on future SIL!!

posted 6 years ago in Family
Post # 3
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Truthfully? You need to ask her about it directly. There’s no way for you to resolve the situation without asking her about her behavior. There may be something that she’s extremely upset about and hasn’t shared with you. Figure it out, resolve it, and then be a family.

Good luck! 

Post # 4
2253 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Don’t invite her to be a part of the bridal party. It’s your bridal party to include the people who mean the most to you to help support you on a very important day. Why would you include someone who goes out of her way time and time again to disrespect you? Don’t invite that tension in your wedding process. Just because she isn’t a member of a bridal party doesn’t mean she has no role in the wedding. She is the groom’s sister. I say you let it be. Some people just don’t get along no matter how hard one person may try.

Post # 5
1430 posts
Bumble bee

Not communicating when you feel there is tension will only stir up more problems. I know from previous SIL problems that when you don’t just sit down and talk it our everything will escalate to a bigger deal than it is. Don’t read too much into texts, emails ect. Ask to go to coffee with her and just say straight up, “hey, I’d really like to have a good relationship with you since we are going to be sisters but I feel like there has been tension between us for awhile now and was wondering if there was anything I did to bother you? ” And go from there. IF your not willing to talk with her then your going to be dealing with these feelings for the rest of your life.  I wouldn’t ask her to be in your bridal party. I thinkthat should be saved for the most important people in your life who support you. She should understand why she isn’t a Bridesmaid or Best Man, but if your relationship does improve during the wedding planning process you can include her in other wedding things.

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