(Closed) I can't stand it anymore!! (NWR)

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2869 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

πŸ™ I don’t have much advice other than… if they judge me before they know me, I judge them for that.  Seriously.  Not worth it.  If they want to hate you for no reason, they aren’t worth it

Post # 5
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@imageeksowhat:  I feel like I could have written your post. All of it.

Because I have had people seem to just dislike me for no apparent reason on so many occasions, I’m pretty shy, and always polite. I have been told I look like I’m always angry/frowning, and that’s probably why… I find it pretty hard to change the habit when I’ve had people be nasty to me and belittle me for absolutely no reason.

I totally understand how hard it is not to let it bother you. We can only try πŸ™‚ And I’m sure you’re very pretty, us ladies never give ourselves the credit we deserve!

Post # 6
Member
4429 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@imageeksowhat:  i feel you! with me all of my boss’s dislike me i dont understand that caz im the only one that listens to what they say ; ( and people dislike me for no reason too. i dont know why and it use to really bug me and make me cry and very sad. now i just dont care ; ) i pay attention to the people that do like me and brush off the ones that dont. now i notice that i don’t care they try to get to know me.

Post # 7
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I feel you.  I’ve always wondered the same thing myself but have never really brought it up to anyone in order to avoid sounding so conceited.  But I can’t put it on anything else! I mean, I too keep to myself a lot but when I interact with others, I’m always polite with a smile.  I had a friend tell me once, “When I first saw you walk into the classroom, I thought you were going to be a total B but you turned out to be so cool!”  I guess when I’m not smiling, I look angry? But c’mon, who walks around smiling from ear to ear all the time.  This is one of the reasons I avoid girls because one little facial expression can be misconstrued for something else.

Post # 8
Member
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

Well I guess everyone has opinions on other people without really knowing them. For me, people don’t take me seriously, I’m 24 years old and somethings people will be like: “how old are you?16?”

And they of course can’t see me as a responsible adult, as they see me as a teenager or somethings, when I’m really responsible and solid personality person. 

I think your situation is worse then mine since may prevent you from making friends, but I think you shouldn’t worry too much about it, since you say you act normal and nice, because if people don’t take the time to really get to know you and see the person you really are, then you should do the same. You have people in you life that know the real you, so stick with them πŸ™‚

I’m sure you’re nice, just give the people some time, and forget that first impression.

 

Post # 9
Member
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I totally understand how you feel and I am truly sorry you are experience this kind of pain. I can only chalk it up as people get jealous when they see a person who is attractive and sure of herself. It makes people uncomfortable because they arent that way and want tear you down.

BIG HUG

Post # 10
Member
4659 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@imageeksowhat:  Are you me?

I have a slightly different problem though. I don’t get the mean girl thing, people just think I’m “weird.” I’m similar though in that I try to smile and be polite and kind always, and help people, and don’t go out that much. People just seem to be mean to me because I’m “odd” or something. It’s gotten a little better as I’ve gotten older and better at acting “normal,” whatever that means, but I still sense it plenty of situations or hear it outright from people. 

Post # 11
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2000

You are not weird I’m sure.

It’s just…some people get intimidated easily. And maybe you’ve encountered those kinds of people in your life recently. Whatever. I know it is hard but stop caring. And think about what makes you YOU. Would you want to change that?

I don’t think so.

Just surround yourself with people who love you for who you are. Life is short and we cannot waste it worrying what other random people think about us.

We need it to enjoy. OUR WAY πŸ™‚

Post # 13
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@imageeksowhat:  I’m so sorry. I can completely relate to what you’re going though. It’s happened to me numerous times-especially when I was in high school. At this point in my life, I just surround myself with people that care and love me for who I am. Don’t worry about those idiots! They are not worth your time or effort.

and btw I came across your wedding recap too-we shared the same photographer (I had them for my engagement session). I actually remember when FCI posted photos of your wedding on their facebook site. So to say you’re not pretty, you’re dead wrong. I thought you were gorgeous! πŸ™‚

Post # 15
Member
2087 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Many many many people have told me that before they met me, they thought I’d be a bitch.  I guess my regular face (as in…. not smiling, but just when walking down a hall alone kinda thing) looks like I’m angry?? Or Bitchy?  I don’t know.  All my sister’s friends in highschool said that, I made AWESOME friends at my old job that I hung out with ALL the time, it was a super close knit work environment and pretty much all of them said at first they thought I’d be super bitch.  I guess it’s the same thing, unless I’m smiling, I look angry or bitchy.  I’m also super shy with new people so I’m very quiet which doesn’t help. 

 

It’s definitely frustrating, but it is what it is.  Can’t change my face!  Maybe it’s a similar situation for you? Who knows why we all get the first impressions we do… so many subconscious factors

Post # 16
Member
464 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I work hard to get along with people at work, but remembering details about their lives and listening.  I spend my own time doing activities I love and at least I have that in common with people I meet in those circumstances.  I think finding common ground is key.

I do believe that once I and my peers got a little older, everyone stopped being snap-judgemental and giving a rip about what other people think of them.

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