(Closed) I cant take this sh*t anymore

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
4054 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

This guy sounds like he has a shit ton of growing up to do before he’s anyone’s Fiance, or worse, husband.

Post # 3
Member
2257 posts
Buzzing bee

Uh I’d be heading for the hills if my Fiance were about to get into an illegal “business” venture.

That does not sound grown up to me. If he wants that he needs to move to Washington, Colorado or Alaska. He sounds like a child, reckless, and you don’t need to get dragged down in his mindless and illegal activities.

No way, just get out. Give him an ultimatem if you need to, if you just truly love him. I just wouldn’t expect much.

Post # 4
Member
11616 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

Good for you for getting your life together but it seems like your SO isn’t there yet. I don’t think selling medical marijuana is going to go over well if one partner is also selling street pot. Pretty sure law enforcement looks for stuff like that.

Post # 5
Member
768 posts
Busy bee

Princesskitty101:  I am sorry you are going hrough this 🙁 

Put your foot down on this. If he is not willing to do the right thing, walk away. Relationships should not be this hard and you should not be feeling like this. 

Sending you e-hugs.

Post # 6
Member
2942 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

You can really tell a lot about someone by who they allow in their life and who they suround themselves with.   If your Fiance isn’t willing to cull this person out of his life, he is at least partially condoning that sort of life style.  If that isn’t he life style you want, I would suggest breaking up with your Fiance.  

Post # 7
Member
2734 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

You are 21 (which is still young) how old is your FI? He sounds very immature and not ready to get married and definitely not ready to start a business. I mean, hell, he can’t even get rent from his deadbeat friend. He has no balls to stand up for himself and surrounds himself with toxic people.

And FWIW, I knew a guy that moved out to Colorado from Jersey (where I’m from) to get into the legal weed selling business because he was a huge pot head and basically thought “yeah maaann.. I get to smoke AND make money off it legally!” dream job for a pot head and that’s why all the stoners move out there to start these “awesome job opportunities”. I’ll tell you, his business failed in 2 weeks and he was back in Jerz a month later. These dead beats (roommates/friends, not your FI) can’t just sit around and smoke pot all day and expect to make a business out of it.

You need to set his ass straight and he needs to kick these people out and get his shit together before you even THINK about marriage. Give it a few years and let him grow up first.

Post # 8
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

 

Princesskitty101:  I think it’s good you’re seeing this side of his life, before you make it forever with “I do’s”. BUT- if it’s not your home, and you techinically don’t need to be there, then why put yourself in a situation and be around people you don’t want to be around?

Distance yourself from the situation. It could pull your Fiance closer to you and realize what he really may be missing if he doesn’t get his shit together.

Post # 9
Member
811 posts
Busy bee

This behavior should stop when college is over. Or honstly, before senior year. At least all the kids I knew like this have stopped, and have great jobs and relationships now, or they didn’t and are exactly the same years later.

So.. is he done with school and doing a “real” job? How long will you give him to get his act together? Because I’d be worried he’d turn into group #2.

Post # 10
Member
2734 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

 I work in pain management and medical marijuana is very popular and may be a good business venture.  However, just like a good bartender doesn’t drink he shouldn’t be sitting there smoking pot regularly unless he himself has a legitimate medical reason to do so.

Just read through the comments on the other post and saw someone write this. And I 100% agree. If your Fiance is serious about this business he first needs to ditch the friends, ESPECIALLY the one selling in VA. Starting a medical marijuana distrubiting company and still smoking/hanging out with pot heads/was an ex pot head just really makes me think the guy is extremely immature and naive. He does realize this “business” (if he actually wants to make money) is not about smoking weed right?

Post # 12
Member
2425 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

Since you don’t actually live there just go home and don’t come back. You should not want to do be with a guy who is into doing anything illegal. A person like that isn’t capable of being a husband and is in no shape of being somebody’s father one day if you choose to have kids.

Post # 13
Member
4054 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

If you can’t even trust him to make decisions about his friends, how do you think that’s going to translate to married life? What happens when there’s tough decisions, be it with buying a house, or health issues, or family struggles, or maybe having kids one day?

If you can’t trust him to do what’s best for you as a couple now that you are engaged and he is 30 years old, when and how do you think that’s going to change?

Post # 14
Member
2734 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Princesskitty101:  WOAH! I was expecting you to say he was like 22/23. Yeah…. if they all haven’t grown up by now, when is it gonna happen? IS it ever going to happen??

I totally understand not wanting to be the “nagging fiancee” and the “dream crusher”. Hell, you don’t want to cause resentment and hold him back from what he wants, right? You also can’t be a doormat. You need to stand up for what you want and not be afraid of him calling you a nag. You should encourage him to be better, i.e. getting rid of the friends that will inevitably bring him down. 

You’re young. Too young to be tied into this mess with a GROWN ASS MAN who acts like a child. He’s a manchild.

Post # 15
Member
608 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

This was literally the only reaction I can think of for this post.

The topic ‘I cant take this sh*t anymore’ is closed to new replies.

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