- 7 years ago
- Wedding: April 2016
My SO brings up proposal, marriage, and kids often, so it stays on my mind. (I also watch a lot of say yes to the dress, haha). I told him when we moved in that we should not live together longer than a year without getting engaged, and he agreed. That was in May.
He often uses the word “soon” to describe when we’ll get engaged, and told me he wouldn’t make me wait long. Well, that was not specific enough for me (I know, I’m a control freak), so today I asked some specific questions and got some answers!
Last night b/c I wanted to go out and he wanted to stay in, he promised that today we could do whatever I wanted. I told him I wanted to run a few errands, one of them being look at rings. He agreed! But first we went out to eat. At the restaurant the subject of marriage/engagement came up (mainly initiated by him). Without going into too much detail, since it was a pretty detailed convo… I asked him when he thought we would get engaged. First he said “I can’t tell you, your’e not supposed to know!” I told him I needed an idea b/c I had a feeling our timelines were different. He said 8 months, maybe sooner! I couldn’t believe he had an exact number of months. He said he thinks about it all the time, even though he doesn’t tell me every time it’s on his mind. When I asked for his view on when he actually wanted to get married he did tell me he felt a little pressured (I was surprised since he talks about it so much, but appreciated his honesty.) We agreed that engagement meant marriage would follow shortly, and that we did not want to rush the wedding b/c we should do it right. There was more to the convo but those were the highlights.
So after lunch, we went to this jewelry wholesale place where many jewelers were set up….and had a GREAT ring browsing experience. He really took the initiative to approach the counters, asked a ton of questions, and made me try a bunch on. I was teaching him about color and clarity, and he told me the carat he wants to get (which was bigger than I was expecting). I told him the type of setting I liked, and he told me what he liked for me. Without going into too much detail, it was a great experience. When we left he said “Now I learned some things about rings. I already have an idea of what I want your ring to look like when I get it.”
I was SO shocked that he wanted to be in control of the situation b/c I always figured I would pick out exactly what I wanted to make the process easier for him. I have even shown him a ring (the first time we went looking…it was more me showing him a specific ring) that I liked. But looks like he’ll be doing the picking himself!
I can’t believe I have this much clarity on the situation and I’m SO glad I had “straight talk” with him on the topic (b/c I tend to be indirect). I feel so much better. That conversation eased my waiting anxiety. Anxiety gone…at least until 8 months from now!
Now I feel like I am officially waiting.
Just needed to share. Thanks for reading!