(Closed) I did something b-a-d on Facebook…

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4150 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t think you’re a bad person for thinking it, but I don’t think you should have posted it on the picture for everyone to see.  You said Fiance and her are good friends, and now it makes you look childish for bashing her publicly.  If you really have a problem with her, you need to talk to your Fiance and tell him how uncomfortable you are with their friendship.  I do agree with Fiance that you should apoligize to her, maybe not for your feelings towards her, but for saying rude things about her on FB.

Post # 4
Member
202 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think you were in the wrong. It seems like it was just two people posing together, and you said your Fiance and the woman are friends. Would you feel the same way if you posted a picture of you and a guy friend (a co-worker too) and your Fiance got offended and demanded you take it down, and then posted nasty things about your friend? You can’t help not liking the woman (trust me, there are lots of women in my FI’s life that I despise), but I think it was immature of you.

Post # 5
Member
500 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I agree that it was definitely immature – I see that the post has since been deleted, but i did get a chance to read it.  You didn’t have to delete it just because folks didn’t agree with your actions – I’m sure someone out there agrees with you, just not the folks who have posted so far. 

I hope that you feel ok after your actions and that your Fiance doesn’t think that you handled it badly.  Did you post as your name on FB or as a anonymous account? I don’t think i saw that part.

Post # 6
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

wow

Post # 10
Member
6021 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

hmmmm I missed the original post. now im intrigued….darn it

Post # 10
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee

((hugs)) this is a really sucky Monday for a lot of us it seems 🙁

Post # 11
Member
500 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

@coffeegal85:  Is it possible that the poster posted the new picture of him and the skanky woman to show that she does it to everyone and not just your FI? 

You shouldn’t let it get to you- you’ve got the ring and apparently this woman has issues.  Be secure in your awesomeness – there will always be folks who are out to get what you have – he’s yours right?  He’s not going anywhere.

Sorry to keep re-posting to the thread.

Post # 12
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@coffeegal85: I didn’t see the original post, but I think the bigger issue here is that your Fiance is friends with a woman who clearly makes you uncomfortable and doesn’t seem to care. Why would he be hanging out with her, and taking pictures with her?

Post # 13
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

i also read it. I know exactly how you feel as I was once in your shoes..but you posting something (acting on it)..only makes it worst.  If your fi is good friends with her and the friend who posted the photo, then you only fueled talks about you (and i’m sure it’s not how great you are) and giving them more reason to find fault with you to your Fiance. 

I think you should really be concerned that your guy doesn’t care about your feelings..regardless whether or not it is valid.  Yikes..that would make me crazy.  Could you guys have a talk and discuss what it is and isn’t that you’re comfortable with? 

Post # 14
Member
1835 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Wow. If my Darling Husband did this and then refused to at least acknowledge that I had issues with it for legitimate reasons, I couldn’t stay in the relationship. Seriously. That’s completely ridiculous that someone who is supposed to be your future HUSBAND cannot even at least take the time to understand why it bothers you. That is not respectful.

However, I would not have gone to the extreme you did.

Post # 15
Member
6998 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

i read it before it got deleted and though i think it was handled wrong i can understand how you are feeling – being young(er) than this woman can be intimidating. While i was still dating my husband he was “internal sales manager” at his company so he had a few people under him, including one older lady – probably late 30’s (not calling anyone old! just older than us, he was 25, i was 24) anyway – i had never met her, no idea what she looked like but he would complain about her sometimes, just not doing a very good job and too chatty, needed alot of help stuff like that so i wasnt too worried about it until he started getting texts from her over the weekend or she would be calling his cell after work hours – it really bothered me even though i KNEW nothing was going on – it was me being insecure and expecting the worst – luckily i think i handled it right, i told my Fiance that i really didnt appreciate her calling or texting, that there isnt anything important enough that can’t wait until monday morning and not to mention he is her boss and it wouldnt look really good if people knew about it – well a few months later she was let go from her position there- by that time we were engaged and she gave us a nice bottle of champagne as a congrats – i still had never met her but it was a nice thought and i felt so stupid for ever getting upset about it.

its inevitable that they are going to work with women, some more beautiful, more talented, smarter – sometimes its just all about trust and learning how to handle situation that makes you insecure

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