I did something stupid.

posted 2 months ago in Relationships
Post # 2
2383 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Girl, we all make mistakes. Even if you did throw them away it was an accident (and one done while trying to help the overall household). All you can do is apologise, get some new ones and move on.

Plus it sounds like you have young kids so no wonder you are tired! 

This will be a short term annoyance for him but (unless he’s a complete jerk) he will quickly get over it. 

Who knows, he may have even put them somewhere himself and this will all be nothing! 

Post # 3
990 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

All you can do is apologise, get some new ones and move on.

Agree. We all make mistakes, don’t beat yourself up for it!

Post # 4
1241 posts
Bumble bee

Apologise, admit that you may be at fault and let go. It’s easily done.

Post # 5
5033 posts
Bee Keeper

lollipoppins :  As per the PP’s, don’t beat yourself up too much, we all make mistakes, apoligise and get him some new ones. He won’t stay mad for too long if it was an honest mistake.

Post # 6
5633 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

lollipoppins :  

This is dh’s nightmare scenario.  He hates throwing things away.  I can’t, literally can’t deal with clutter.  His office is unbearable to me.

His big fear is that in my zeal to declutter, I’ll throw something important away.  This from the man who packed up and moved a broken keyboard.

Dh:  You probably want to save this, right?  (Holding up something truly irreplaceable, like a couple of sporks).

Me:  Nooooooooo!  Throw it away! 

Dh:  (Sigh of resignation).  I was just checking.  I wouldn’t want to throw out something important.

Me:  Oh, please.  Go ahead, start throwing.  I’ll chance it.

Of course, nothing gets thrown away, including his precious sporks.  They just get dumped in his office.


Dh’s “logic”.  And I quote:  “Someday, you’re going to throw out the wrong piece of paper and DESTROY YOUR LIFE.”

In the many years I’ve known Dh, this was the first time I seriously questioned his mental health.

In any case, Bee.  Stuff happens.  My Dh,who never throws anything away, once threw a blank, SIGNED check into the trash.  I’d issue a prophylactic apology, in case you actually did do it and let it go after that.


Post # 7
1697 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

So if you did throw the shoes away, my thought is that they wouldn’t have been with his other shoes? They’d be somewhere else, perhaps because they were muddy? I say this because it’s highly unlikely that if all his shoes were together you’ve randomly picked two pair to throw away but leave the others.

If he’s left them out somewhere and you have thrown them, it’s 50/50 in my book. You’ve apologised, you didn’t do it on purpose, he needs to get over it. Especially when he knows you’re clearing things out for moving. I also say this as the messy person in my relationship – if you leave your crap out, expect it to get broken or thrown.

Post # 8
47 posts

He needs to get over it. As someone that just put their house on the market, it’s a lot of work and he should be happy you are working towards de-cluttering. Especially with 3 kids to look after too. Do you throw shoes and clothes or put them aside to go to Goodwill? Around here even beat up shoes can be donated, they typically go to the shelters. Did they end up in a donate pile?

If you have apologized he needs to move on, you didn’t do it on purpose. Don’t beat yourself up. You’ve got enough to worry about!

Post # 9
2381 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2017 - Outside in Paris

All you can do is apologize. 

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