(Closed) I didnt take my MOH when I got my dress

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1798 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

She’s overreacting in a huge way. You are totally free to shop for your wedding dress however and whenever you want. Have you tried explaining what happened with the dress and asking exactly why she’s hurt? Maybe you can also point out that you can still look for Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses together

Post # 4
Member
362 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@c0l0urful1:  You didn’t plan not go without her, you dropped in fell in love and bought the dress. Stop apologizing. Let her know you didn’t do this to hurt her and there are plenty of other wedding things that she can be involved in. She is being a drama queen and acting like a child. There are plenty of other things she can as Maid/Matron of Honor that are wedding or dress (alterations etc.) related.

Post # 5
Member
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

Wow, that’s pretty immature of your Maid/Matron of Honor. You should stick your ground. You did nothing wrong. Give her time to calm down, and then just tell her that you had hoped to share the experience with her, but that this just happened and you fell in love with a dress, but that you want to make sure you can share the rest of these important moments with her.

Post # 6
Member
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I bought my dress in a similar way–I was browsing on the weddingbee classifieds, saw my dream dress at an insane price and bought it.  My Maid/Matron of Honor was hurt but excited for me.  She helped me try it on and took pics for my mom when it came in the mail.  Your Maid/Matron of Honor is seriously overreacting.    

Post # 7
Member
2999 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

When I go dress shopping I’m takigo my moamend my sister. Maybe grandma. Other than that no one else is coming. Don’t feel bad- its your choice!

Post # 8
Member
196 posts
Blushing bee

She’d have a right to be hurt if you purposefully invited everyone BUT her.  Since you bought it by yourself on the spur of the moment, I’m not sure why her panties are in a twist.

Honestly, she should either grow up or get out.

Post # 9
Member
556 posts
Busy bee

@c0l0urful1:  she’s being REALLY immature. you have nothing to apologize for.

she should be excited you found your dream dress. not hating on your moment or raining on your parade. 

my best friend lives in a different state. i didnt go shopping w/her or the other girls. i got pictures. i emailed she looked beautiful. easy. no drama!

Post # 10
Member
502 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I bought my dress with my mom before I even asked anyone to be in my bridal party or to be my Maid/Matron of Honor. I would have liked to have her there, but it wasn’t a huge deal. I told her right away I bought it and sent her pics and she was happy for me. it’s your day. your dress. and you can do what you want. you didn’t plan to do it without her. when you find the dress and know it’s the one then you should buy it! why wait when you find your dress!? you were so excited and you should be. she should have been excited for you. it’s not about her. it’s about you. i think she is being ridiculous and hurtful. and you don’t owe her an apology.

Post # 11
Member
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I didn’t either.. NBD.. she is over reacting.. unless she specifically said to you that she really wanted to go. Don’t cancel your wedding and tell her to relax for a minute. 

Post # 12
Member
3261 posts
Sugar bee

You don’t need to make it up to her, you did nothing wrong. Congrats on your dress, hopefully she’ll stop being dramatic sometime soon 🙂 

Post # 13
Member
6824 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

OP, I found my dress my myself.  No one was with me.  So yeah your Maid/Matron of Honor is competely over reacting.  If you really want to make it up to her, take her to show her the dress, maybe that will help?

Post # 14
Member
653 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

There’s nothing you can do to make it up to her because you don’t have to make it up to her! My sister went on her own and of course I was a little shocked and hurt but in the end it was her choice. I think it would be totally different if you invited everyone but her as a PP said. She needs to realize this is your wedding not hers.

P.S. Congratulations on finding your dress!

Post # 15
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Whoa, your Maid/Matron of Honor honestly sounds like the kind of person I would not want in my bridal party.  You are under NO obligation to take your Maid/Matron of Honor or anyone else shopping with you, and she has no right to be mad at you for that or for falling for a dress and getting it unexpectedly.  If she’s throwing such a fit over this, just imagine what a complete horror she will be when she does other wedding tasks. Your shower/bachelorette/BM-dresses/etc is probably going to be all about her instead of you, just imagine what kinds of fits she will throw on other issues. You need to tell her that she is seriously hurting you by valuing a dress shopping trip over your feelings and friendship. For reals. I only took my mom with me–didn’t even think about asking anyone else.

Post # 16
Member
1013 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

When I bought my dress my Maid/Matron of Honor was not there. I had been shopping a bunch of times and only once was she with me. I happened to know there was a sale at one of the shops so I went on a whim with my baby bro lol. I was having lunch with him down from the shop and wanted a guys opinion so I tried on my top 3 and he picked out my dress without even knowing which one was the one I really loved and he picked it! My Maid/Matron of Honor was no mad she was a little sad that she was not there but after i had explained it to her she was fine. She knows that she will be ther for the fittings etc. Your Maid/Matron of Honor is over reacting big time

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