Post # 1
This is horrible to say but its true. Best man and i use to be friends but since all his friends have gotten gfs or become engaged he has become extremely rude to all the gfs and fiancees! This guy has called me fat 3 times(i am a size 8) and had the nerve to casually say to me “catcha later C*nt” !!!! there has also been ALOT of sly remarks here and there. There is only so much more i can tolerate. im at the point where i have told FH that if the best man does not smarten his act up i want him off the party. I dont think having someone who is so disrespectful towards me should be involved in the most important day of our life. FH also agrees this behaviour isnt acceptable. does anyone else have any dramas like this? sorry for such a long post x
Post # 3
Wow that is completely unacceptable and so disrespectful to both you and your FI! We have had our share if troubles with the Bridesmaid or Best Man, but he is just flakey not rude and offensive. has your Fiance spoken to him and let him know that this won’t be tolerated going forward?
Post # 4
I would lose my mind if he did any of that to my face. He’d probably get a hard punch in the nose. Adult bullies will generally continue their behaviour unless confronted. (Not that you should punch him!) But even having you or Fiance outright ask “What is your problem? Why are you so mean?” It draws attention to the behaviour in a civil, and almost condescending way.
Post # 5
- Wedding: October 2014 - UK
Oh man, that sucks so bad. I’m sorry! That sort of behaviour is never acceptable, unless there’s an established tone for it. If it’s a sudden switch and he’s just being a arse, your FH needs to speak to him, because it’s not on.
I’m a bit worried about FH’s brother, who was just such a dick when we went away on holiday as a family this year. He makes fun of FH and I’s ideas – he kept calling us tourists, and rolling his eyes at us, and he’s just downright rude to FH a lot of the time. He’s so negative and grumpy. And FH’s grandma thinks he should be best man! Which she said in front of EVERYONE at the last family gathering. We waved it off as having “not thought about it yet”, but at most he’ll be in the wedding party. And I think FH is only doing that out of obligation.
I’m a little worried he’ll just carry on with the behaviour he showed when we were on holiday – refusing to do things because they’re not his ‘style’. It was a fight to get him into family photos at all, so trying to get any fun ones at the wedding will just be awful I imagine.
Post # 6
FH told him he cant say this kind of stuff but Bridesmaid or Best Man just doesnt get it! FH doesnt like confrontations or anything like that but it ends up me yelling at him because he should be saying more to him. its the last thing i need whilst planning a wedding!! i just dont know what else to do. one more thing and hes out! sounds horrible but im just so fed up!
Post # 7
after the fat comment all i thought of was punching his stupid face lol
Post # 8
I have an issue with a groomsman myself but he wouldn’t dream of being that rude to me. Sorry your dealing with this but I can relate to a somewhat spineless Fiance. I hope it works out for you though, thats not fun at all. (For the record I would also punch the dude in the nose)
Post # 9
I would just handle the situation yourself since getting your Fiance to talkto him clearly isn’t working. Next time he does something, just calmly say “Excuse me? That’s really not an appropriate thing to say and, to be perfectly honest, it offends me. I’ve noticed you are saying things like that a lot, and I really don’t appreciate it. Could you please tone it down?”
Always take the high road.
Post # 10
DH had a friend like that – they’re no longer friends.