(Closed) I DO NOT like the best man…

posted 8 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Wow that is completely unacceptable and so disrespectful to both you and your FI! We have had our share if troubles with the Bridesmaid or Best Man, but he is just flakey not rude and offensive. has your Fiance spoken to him and let him know that this won’t be tolerated going forward?

Post # 4
1853 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I would lose my mind if he did any of that to my face. He’d probably get a hard punch in the nose. Adult bullies will generally continue their behaviour unless confronted. (Not that you should punch him!) But even having you or Fiance outright ask “What is your problem? Why are you so mean?” It draws attention to the behaviour in a civil, and almost condescending way.

Post # 5
2587 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - UK

Oh man, that sucks so bad. I’m sorry! That sort of behaviour is never acceptable, unless there’s an established tone for it. If it’s a sudden switch and he’s just being a arse, your FH needs to speak to him, because it’s not on.

I’m a bit worried about FH’s brother, who was just such a dick when we went away on holiday as a family this year. He makes fun of FH and I’s ideas – he kept calling us tourists, and rolling his eyes at us, and he’s just downright rude to FH a lot of the time. He’s so negative and grumpy. And FH’s grandma thinks he should be best man! Which she said in front of EVERYONE at the last family gathering. We waved it off as having “not thought about it yet”, but at most he’ll be in the wedding party. And I think FH is only doing that out of obligation.


I’m a little worried he’ll just carry on with the behaviour he showed when we were on holiday – refusing to do things because they’re not his ‘style’. It was a fight to get him into family photos at all, so trying to get any fun ones at the wedding will just be awful I imagine.

Post # 8
106 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have an issue with a groomsman myself but he wouldn’t dream of being that rude to me. Sorry your dealing with this but I can relate to a somewhat spineless Fiance. I hope it works out for you though, thats not fun at all. (For the record I would also punch the dude in the nose)

Post # 9
642 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I would just handle the situation yourself since getting your Fiance to talkto him clearly isn’t working. Next time he does something, just calmly say “Excuse me? That’s really not an appropriate thing to say and, to be perfectly honest, it offends me. I’ve noticed you are saying things like that a lot, and I really don’t appreciate it. Could you please tone it down?”

Always take the high road.

Post # 10
989 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

DH had a friend like that – they’re no longer friends.

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